


Because it's you

by Moonlight2211



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternative Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafes, Angst with a Happy Ending, Attempt at Humor, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, Implied Hyungki, Implied Yoonki, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Rating May Change, Slow Build, Strangers to Friends to Lovers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-11
Updated: 2019-05-11
Packaged: 2019-11-12 20:42:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 27,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18018101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moonlight2211/pseuds/Moonlight2211
Summary: No one ever taught him what love is or how to love, because love is something no one can teach. Love is something you feel without trying, the happiness and anticipation of seeing that person, that bubbling you feel in your stomach when that person smiles at you or even looks in your general direction and that ‘thump thump thump thump’ your heart does when that person notices you, holds your hand, or hugs you, or kisses you.They are not a person to cover the lonely place in your bed, house and heart, but it needs to be a special person who makes you feel you won’t ever be lonely again even though you’re alone.And if that special person happens to be someone from your same sex, then it’s okay.And if that special person happens to be the struggling boy Im Changkyun… then it’s okay.And Kihyun needed to learn this… the hard way.





	Because it's you

**Author's Note:**

  * For [moon__goddess](https://archiveofourown.org/users/moon__goddess/gifts).



> Song Inspired: Boy by EXID (Kind of!) 
> 
> Actually my inspiration to write this fic is D+1 by Everglow ♥ if you have time check them out please~ 
> 
> This used to be a 5k words fic but really went out of hand at the middle! Though I kinda proud of this fic, it has fluff, angst and a little bit of smut at the end :3! 
> 
> Really really hope you'll like ~♥

“C’mon Ki, it’s only 11pm! The night is young and you’re leaving already?!”

Kihyun takes a long breath to try to calm his nerves, rubbing his temples to ease the upcoming headache, and glares at his friends for their stupidity and the embarrassing scene they’re making in his favorite bar.

He’s upset and definitively does _not_ want to laugh at them, so he bites his lower lip to prevent any sound would leave his mouth, even though he can’t hide the smile tugging at the corners of his lips, so at the end the brown haired man gives up and chuckles softly, because his friends right now are definitively _too much_ to handle.

Lee Minhyuk, his childhood and best friend, is clinging onto his leg like a child to his mother on the first day of class, while his other childhood and best friend, Chae Hyungwon, has his arms wrapped around the smaller man’s shoulders, using his stature to the fullest to obstruct any move Kihyun may attempt.

If he’s totally sincere, it’s not like Kihyun really wants to go, he would really enjoy it waaaaay more to stay with his two best friends, the Hoseok guy Hyungwon’s introducing that night as his dance group member and the ten girls they brought ‘to have fun’ that night, than go to his apartment and probably only mope around and sleep. But after a long day of interminable boring classes and a long shift in the Coffee shop, his muscles are aching and his mind is screaming for a well-deserved night of rest.

“At least stay until midnight Ki, It’s not like _someone_ is waiting for you at home.”

Kihyun, using the little strength his body still has, pushes Hyungwon’s arms away from his body and successfully separates his legs from Minhyuk’s deadly grip, enough to take three steps far from his annoying friends and finally send them a frightening glare, not because their insistence bothers him, no, he was already used to it since a very long time ago, but the reminder of his own lonely home actually hurt him a little bit.

“Of course there’s someone waiting for me, you big idiot. I bet my _princess_ missed me so much the whole day.”

The girls and Hoseok seem a little bit down when Kihyun said he needs to go now, but they had a lot fun and he leaves the bar with a huge smile and the number of a couple girls on his phone, even though Kihyun isn’t planning to call or text or hold any further conversation with them after that night. The girls are okay… actually they’re gorgeous, with pretty faces, good body and funny but not exactly Kihyun’s type.

Under the bright glow of the moonlight, the brown haired man makes his way to his apartment, enjoying the cold wind of night hitting his face and the beautiful view of a starless night with the full moon shining in its fullest.

As he opens the door, he’s greeted by his overexcited mini-poodle called Gigi jumping immediately into his arms. His little puppy is waving her little tail excitedly while she licks his face, and even though that should be disgusting to the usually neat-freak man, Kihyun got used to her commonly bright personality and instead of pushing her away, he holds her tighter against his chest.

She is, after all, the only creature waiting for him at home.

After feeding his puppy and putting her to sleep, Kihyun takes a long and refreshing bath, washing his drunkenness and exhaustion away enough to prepare a fast dish for dinner, eating and climbing into his bed.

If he’s totally honest, Kihyun _really_ can’t complain.

Even though they’re annoying as fuck and he has sometimes that intense necessity to kick them out of his life, or kill them and bury their bodies somewhere, Kihyun needs to admit he has been blessed with the company of some of the best people whom he can call his best friends.

His parents are still together and very much in-love, so he was raised in the warmth of a supportive, affectionate family and although they’re strict with their principles, they’ve showered their kids with all the love a family should provide.

And his brother? Kihyun loves his brother _to death_. They’ve fought a lot while they were growing, sure, but at the end of the day Kihyun knew he can find another – _annoying_ \- best friend in his own home.

His family has provided him with some of the best luxuries a simple college student could only wish to have. An apartment all by himself in the centre of Seoul, the best education ever since Elementary School and even now he’s studying in the best Private University in the country, a stable job in one of his mom’s Coffee shops as the manager, and his friends are his coworkers, so his day is full of fun and laughs.

He can’t deny it, life is treating him well, _so_ well.

But at night, as he lays alone in a bed too big for only a person, no one to hold or be held at night and cuddle him when he’s feeling down, Kihyun thinks he may not be alone, but he feels lonely.

He may as well try to call one of those pretty girls after all.

 

**~*~**

 

After the fourth sigh, Minhyuk _lost it_. Ever since pretty early that day Kihyun has been around the coffee shop holding a sad expression on his face, and Minhyuk or Hyungwon just can’t ignore it anymore. Sadly, despite their attempts to cheer him up, their efforts were declined with a harsh _‘I’m okay guys, go back to work now_!’ so they decided to give him their silent support from the distance and gave him the space Kihyun urgently craved.

Kihyun’s a weird man, there’s no way any of them could deny it, but the kind of weird they’re used is totally different from this odd behavior. Kihyun adores nagging at every hour of the day, and cleaning as an obsessive compulsive man and scolding for every single little mistake they make and honestly acts like an aged housewife instead of a 24 years old manager of a coffee shop. Kihyun’s a pain in the ass? Yes, he is. He likes to nag like an annoying mom? They’re already used to it. He likes to flirt with the prettiest customers? Yes, he does, but this gloomy man is something Minhyuk and Hyungwon just _cannot_ handle anymore.

Taking the matter into his hands, Minhyuk silently trances around the Coffee shop, noticing there’s no clientele to attend anymore and Kihyun has already let out his fifth sigh of the day, much to Minhyuk annoyance, but despite of him being merely few centimeters away from the short brunet, the younger makes no movement to acknowledge his presence.

Glancing through the shop, Minhyuk meets Hyungwon’s equally worried eyes and _that_ look is all the youngest needs to walk fast –practically run- to situate at the other side of Kihyun.

Yet, Kihyun’s so concentrated in whatever is in his mind to notice his friends are standing right by his side, so when Minhyuk’s hand delicately pats his shoulder, Kihyun yelps in surprise, spinning around to frown at the slightly elder man.

“ _What_?”

Hyungwon, as weird as it is, seems to be more awake now than he’s ever being in his shift during the three years working there, now staring at Kihyun with a softness so uncharacteristic for him despite the harsh tone Kihyun just used. So instead of the frightening glare Kihyun intended to throw at them a second ago, he smiles shyly, although a little bit sad, replying before they have the chance to actually ask something - “Told you already guys, there’s nothing wrong with me.”

“We know you Ki, for a long time actually and we can tell something is on your mind and you know we’re here if you need us.”

Kihyun sighs a sixth time, his smile fading in a complete line and nods after thinking carefully if he should actually talk with them about _this_ , but then again, they’re his best friends and they won’t make fun of him if this is actually bothering him. No, well, they _definitively_ will make fun of him nevertheless but at least he has someone he can talk to.

“It’s stupid.”

Hyungwon stares at Minhyuk, Minhyuk stares back, possibly thinking the same thing and shaking their heads disapproving Kihyun’s first choice of words.

“If it’s so ‘ _stupid’_ as you say, then you wouldn’t mind share it with us, right?” – Hyungwon says, now with his arm around Kihyun’s shoulders trying to reminder him they’re there for him, whatever his problem is.

“It’s just…” – Kihyun takes a long breath, holding it for few seconds and finally letting out a rather loud sigh - “Do you remember Bona? From the bar the other night. Smaller than me, black hair, pretty face, nice body, a model I think?”

Minhyuk tries to remember the ten girls they were drinking that night but the memories got foggy after the second bottle of soju they drank, then the face of one the girls Kihyun talked the most that night appeared in his mind and she seems to fit better in the description. One of he prettiest girls in the whole Korean population if he can say. Hyungwon, on the other way around, doesn’t have any clue who she is or why Kihyun is talking about her but pushes the brunet to keep talking. Curiosity killed the turtle.

“I texted her yesterday and invited her out for dinner.”

“Oh my god, I knew you two clicked!” – Minhyuk clasps his hands excitedly, even congratulating him for archiving a date with _‘such gorgeous girl’_ but instead of his usual cocky smirk when he tells them about one of his conquests, Kihyun shows them a regretful grimace, one that seriously worries his two friends.  

“It’s not like that…”

“God Ki, I’m sorry. Did something bad happen in your date? Did she do something you didn’t like? Did she…”

“No guys, it’s nothing like that. Just let me finish the story okay?” – When both of them nod, Kihyun takes the courage to tell them the rest, not that he has a lot of options, considering how eager they are for a good gossip - “We went to a restaurant and had dinner. She was really fun and pretty so I asked her if she wanted to go home with me.”

“OH MY GOD! DID YOU…”

“You know I’m not foreigner to one-night stands but, I don’t know, it doesn’t feel right?”

“What? She was bad in bed?”

“I’m not going to discuss that with you guys, that’s private. But if you want to know, no, it has nothing to do with the sex.”

“Ki, sometimes you’re really hard to understand.”

“I know, I even can’t understand myself but it’s something in my chest, you know? When I lie alone in my bed or when a pretty girl spend the night with me it feels… incorrect? It’s not like I’m lonely but I feel that way. Shit, I have you guys and I’m really thankful you’re here for me, and my family is also very present in my life and this pretty girl said she likes me and wants to get to know me better but there’s something really wrong with me. Last night when I was with her, it felt nice finally have someone to hold at night, I felt the warmth of her body against mine but also I felt so empty at the same time? Like something is missing.”

“That’s…”

“Weird, I know. Since quite a long time I have this emptiness inside me, Just, I don’t know guys, maybe I’m really crazy now.”

Minhyuk wraps his arm around Kihyun in an awkward half-hug, much too Kihyun’s chagrin, but before the shorter man can push him away, Minhyuk’s already putting a prudential space between them, and unlike the teasing remark he was waiting from the elder, Minhyuk’s actually giving him one of his brightest smiles – “Maybe you’re finally looking for settling down with someone else, but she wasn’t the right one Ki.”

“I’m too young for ‘setting down’ Minhyuk, maybe I’m just being ridiculous.”

“But well, aren’t you all the time?” – Hyungwon says with a mocking tone behind and Kihyun’s head snaps at his direction, staring angrily at his younger friend with fire in his eyes.

“Yah! It’s time for your lazy asses to go back to work!”

“Yes boss~”

“And Kihyun…” – Minhyuk says before turning completely away, attracting again the attention of the short man, Kihyun looks up expectantly but when a smirk crosses his features, he knows he’ll regret _so much_ telling Minhyuk what was in his mind – “Maybe to fill that emptiness all you need is a good dick---”

“WORK MINHYUK, W.O.R.K.”

Kihyun sighs, he really regrets it now, especially for how loud Minhyuk was and how much of attention Minhyuk brought to him from the customers. Kihyun hates him, really.

“Hmm, Ki?”

The voice of the tall man makes him turn around to meet his eyes. Kihyun raises his eyebrow waiting for one of his smartass comments but when Hyungwon hesitatingly wraps his arms awkwardly around his shoulders in a kind of hug, Kihyun actually yelps.

“What the hell beanpole?”

“Ugh, believe me, this is as painful for you as it is for me.”

“Then, stop hugging me, people are staring.” – Kihyun tries to pry the tall koala off his body but Hyungwon tightened the grip, enough to make it impossible for Kihyun to push him away, much to his disgust.

“Shh, shh, let my warm body wash away your sadness.”

“This is disgusting, stop it.”

“WHAAAT? A group hug and you didn’t invite me?!!” – Kihyun prays to the heaven the elder man won’t do what he thinks he’ll do, but Minhyuk also runs back to behind the counter and hug the other side of Kihyun – “Ahhh this is so nice.”

No, it’s not in Kihyun opinion.

“Hyunwoo! Come here and squeeze us with those big arms of yours!!”

Kihyun watches in horror how the tall man also walks where they’re standing and envelops the three of them in a tight bear hug, complaining for how thin all of them are and proving his point lifting them all at the same time from the floor.

Ugh, Kihyun hates them so much, but he’s so thankful they’re there for him even though the way they show their support is super annoying.

And for the first time that day Kihyun finally pushes to the bottom of his mind this strange feeling and laughs.

Minhyuk and Hyungwon stare at him happily because they archived their objective.   

 

**_~*~_ **

 

A day after that conversation it’s the first time Kihyun sees _him_ and he feels his world turning upside down and he can’t find a sole reason to explain _why_. The brown haired man just feels as if everything around him stopped working and the only people right there are Kihyun and _this boy_.

It’s a normal day, or as normal as it can be, his classes ended earlier and he decided to go directly to the café. Much to Minhyuk and Hyungwon’s disappointment, he dragged them with him and forced them to work ‘ _and if you don’t shut up I’m not calling the first round tonight_.’ And that’s all Kihyun needed to say to plant a huge smile into his friends’ idiotic faces and work enthusiastically the rest of the day.

As usual, he’s behind the counter while Minhyuk and Hyungwon are attending the tables. Hyunwoo is in charge of the coffee machine that day and Mr. Choi is preparing the pastries in the kitchen, a normal day in Kihyun’s life.

Or that’s what he thought, until the little bell above the door resounds in the Coffee shop indicating a new client came in and immediately all their attention is centered on only one person.

There’s nothing extraordinary about this boy… or man? He’s short, maybe around Kihyun’s height, maybe a little bit younger but he can’t say it by only looking at his face. His hair is black and even if the bangs are almost covering his eyes, it suits the man strangely so well. His face is nice, with spectacular brown, deep eyes and a nose a little too big, but still fitting in his face so perfectly, making him look pretty and elegant. His lips are beautiful, not too thick or too thin, just the perfect size and so prettily rosy. He’s stunning even though that’s not a word people should use to describe a man.

That’s not a word _Kihyun_ should be using to describe a customer, that’s for sure, and overall, a _male_ one. Because instead of his face, Kihyun should be more worried than this man has enough money to pay whatever he’s ordering. But damn, he’s not blind and this guy is, indeed, pretty.

And even though he can’t deny this man’s handsomeness, his face, however, is not what pulls his full and undivided attention towards him, but instead the clothes this customer is wearing. An oversize sweater, supposedly to be black but now fading its color to dark grey for how many times this guy should’ve used it already, as well as his sworn sneakers that seems they already have some holes underneath and at the end, the lightly blue ripped jeans, and if Kihyun looks closely, he would’ve noticed that they’re ripped for necessity and not for the current worldwide trend, and damn, Kihyun’s _definitively_ looking closely.

Something extremely awful sets in Kihyun’s stomach when said guy approaches him with hesitant baby steps.

Kihyun’s eyes are not what the man is looking at when he’s already in front of the counter, actually this man is not looking anywhere near Kihyun’s direction, instead staring at one of the cakes as if he hasn’t eating one in _years_ and the brown haired man is tempted to just gift him a slice only to erase those hungry puppy-like eyes from this man. No, he can’t do that.

“Welcome to Louisse Café, what can I get you, sir?”

As Kihyun asks politely, the customer stares up at his eyes, looking away immediately with a pretty blush in his face. It’s not strange that kind of reaction coming from new clients, but usually it's girls who blush and flirt and stuff similar to that with him, modestly talking of course, it’s the first time a boy has such reaction.

And for some reason Kihyun doesn’t detests it as much as he thought he would.

“… _please_ …”

The boy talks so shyly that Kihyun couldn’t understand more of a word he said, and after a ‘Sorry sir, what did you say?’ the customer seems at the edge of panicking and leaving Kihyun’s Coffee shop without buying anything.

“Can you tell me… what is… your cheaper coffee... please…”

A lump forms in Kihyun’s throat due to the pity he feels for this customer, especially after looking how embarrassed the boy turned when he said out loud those words and how much he really wants to run and hide right now. Kihyun tries to smile as always but his lips twitch downwards for a brief moment, thankfully the costumer is so busy glancing at the floor to realize such change in Kihyun’s features.

“Eh, Americano, sir, 3$.”

The client’s hand moves to one of his pockets and gives the exact amount of money to Kihyun. Maybe the boy didn’t intended to let out a sad sigh or makes that gloomy face in front of him and Kihyun, deep inside, wants to ask if there’s something wrong, but remembering this is not his place to interfere, he bites his tongue and tells Hyunwoo the coffee he should prepare.

“To go?”

“No, I’ll take it here, thank you.”

And after he walks to one of the tables and Hyungwon gives the coffee to this strange boy, Kihyun couldn’t help but longingly glance at his direction every couple of minutes.

 

**~*~**

 

It keeps happening. At least once every week during Fridays around 6pm _‘the cute boy’,_ as Kihyun keeps calling him in his mind, goes to the café with a tired face and dark bags under his eyes, orders the same coffee, still avoiding Kihyun’s gaze after that disastrous first meeting and tries his best to talk as little as possible. Then he goes to sit in one of the seats next to the windows and stays there writing something in a notebook for at least an hour, sometimes even two. Every week and every visit Kihyun finds his heart doing _that_ strange thing over and over again, and at some point his mind started anticipating his arrival. It’s been a month and half and Kihyun’s seriously confused.

“You’re ogling him again, Kihyun.”

As Minhyuk talks Kihyun yelps unconsciously, the slightly elder boy taking him completely off guard doing something he shouldn’t be doing. The brown haired man glares at him terrifyingly but deciding Minhyuk doesn’t deserve his time and effort, turns to do what he was doing previously. Read: Stare at the boy while pretending to clean one of the tables near him.  

“I’m not ‘ogling’ anyone, Minhyuk.”

“You’re still staring, though.”

“I’m not. I’m just…”

“Shamelessly staring. Why don’t you go there and talk with him? Like, he seems nice? Maybe a bit shy and I’m sorry man but I bet he already feels your eyes on him _the whole time,_ so, if he’s shy it’s all _your fault.”_

“Do you think…” – A little of panics sets in Kihyun’s heart and shows it in his face, covering it seconds later easily with a cold façade and turning around to go to his safe place: The counter -  “I don’t know what are you talking about.”

Sadly for Kihyun, the elder follows him closely, babbling about how of a bad liar he is and how _dare_ he to lie to his best friend and Kihyun does everything in his power to try to ignore the nuisance that is Lee Minhyuk.

“… I may as well start thinking you have a hardcore moon-sized earth-to-moon crush on that cute little custo---”

“Shut. The. Fuck. Up. He may hear you.” – Kihyun hisses annoyed, covering with his hand the mouth of his very loud best friend slash nemesis and doing very little to hide how much he wants to kill Minhyuk right now. Yet, instead of scaring the fuck off of him, the elder actually looks amused, ready to tease the shorter man if given the opportunity – “Look, I’ve already told you millions of times, I’m not gay and I’ll never have a crush on a man, okay? Get it?”

“Never say never, Ki.”

“Never, never, never, never, never, never, never, never…”

“And people say I am the annoying one.”

“You ARE annoying, now, go back to work.”

“Sure, if you answer a question.”

It’s only necessary to look at his eyes to understand what Kihyun’s trying to say, his face, perhaps, express his feelings better and even if Minhyuk’s good reading his bitchy features, he prefers to ignore it in order to get whatever he wants – “If you don’t have a crush on him, according to your words of course, then why have you been staring at him _shamelessly_ for the past month?”

“I wasn’t…”

“Don’t you dare lie to ME of all the people Yoo Kihyun, even Hyunwoo noticed it and unless we set the coffee shop on fire, he rarely pays attention to us.”

“It’s just,” – Kihyun closes his eyes and lets out a rather loud sigh before opening them and staring at Minhyuk with pleading eyes – “You won’t make me say it, right?”

“Oh Kihyunniee, of course I will, now, what’s wrong with you now?”

“It’s just… it’s stupid I know but… I’m… I’m worried about him?”

“Well, that’s unexpected, you are… _worried_?”

“Yes, it’s just… look at him Minhyuk.” – Of course, Minhyuk doesn’t need any more incentive to look unashamedly at _‘cute boy’’s_ direction. Discretion? That doesn’t exist in Lee Minhyuk’s dictionary, but then again, it doesn’t exist in Yoo Kihyun’s dictionary either.

“Yes, he’s small, cute and struggling with life, someone adorable you can take care of, oh wait, he’s exactly _your type_.”

“I already told you it’s nothing _like that_.”

“Then explain me how _is it_ then.”

“I want to help him, I want him to be okay, but I just can’t go there and _‘oh look, don’t think I’m a weirdo, but I saw you’re having problems with something, do you need my help?’_ he’ll think I lost my mind. Oh fuck, I even think so already! Am I crazy, Min?”

The tone Kihyun uses is desperate, as if he’s clinging to his last thread of sanity and Minhyuk wants to tease him, a lot actually and he can’t control his impulses even if he wants to, so with a mocking smirk, he says:

“Well, my dear friend, I’m afraid to tell you this but you really lost your mind.”

“Miiiinhyyuuk!”

Then the smirk Kihyun’s pretty much starting to hate, twitches into something softer, friendlier, nicer and something shivers into him, fear perhaps - “But what is this world without a little bit of foolishness? It would be boring, right?”

“Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

“I don’t know what you think I’ll say, but if you want my advice, my little friend, then I’d say go for it. You want to talk to him? Go talk to him! You want to help him? Go and help him. You want to befriend him? Go and be his friend, You want him to fall for your little charms? Go. For. It.”

Minhyuk accentuates the last three words pocking Kihyun’s chest with his index finger and – even if that annoys Kihyun deeply – the younger smiles at his best friend’s words and his unconditional support.

“Told you it’s not like that, I’m not gay. But thank you. Now, how the fuck I’ll talk to him? It’s not like I’d go there and _’Hello, nice to meet you, I’m Kihyun, do you want to be my friend_?’ I’ll scare him and he won’t come back again!”

“Riiiighhht, you _obviously_ can’t do that.”

“Min? Minhyuk? Lee Minhyuk, where the hell are you going?!”

“Hmm, tell that cute little buddy over there _‘Hello, nice to meet you, I’m Minhyuk, do you want to be my friend?’_ and see how it works.”

“Minhyuk, _please_.”

“Oh, I’m taking my twenty minutes break now, thank you _boss_.”

_‘I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die…’_

Kihyun repeats into his mind watching in horror how his best friend trances gracefully through the Coffee shop, giving no time for Kihyun to react and try to stop him for – what he thinks it is – the most embarrassing moment in his life. Minhyuk doesn’t stop until he’s right behind the boy Kihyun has been – _admittedly_ – ogling for the past month and half, and before Minhyuk opens his mouth, he glances one last time at his best friend’s terrified eyes with a smirk in his pretty face and despite Kihyun’s begging with his eyes to _not_ do it, the elder man touches _‘cute boy’_ ’s shoulder to attract his attention.

_‘Decision made: Lee Minhyuk is officially dead.’_

Thankfully, no other customer entered in the shop for the next five minutes Kihyun stayed staring at the two guys interacting, and as soon as _‘cute boy’_ stands up and says something to Minhyuk, he makes his way out of shop and with a simple toothless smile, he waves Kihyun goodbye, and that definitively makes _something_ jump in Kihyun’s heart that he still can’t explain.

_‘Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit…’_

“So, his name is Im Changkyun and I think he’s a university student majoring in Music composition. He comes here to write some lyrics because the mood in the café is… Quote: _‘relaxing and lovely’_ and as I said, he’s nice, a little bit shy, but still very friendly, ah! And he’d love to become your friend!”

“I—I--- I’M GONNA KILL YOU LEE MINHYUK!”

 

**~*~**

 

After Minhyuk’s… _revelation_ , the week waiting for ‘ _cute boys’_ ‘s arrival became torturously slow and at the same time agonizingly fast. ‘ _Changkyun’_ as he still can’t get use to call him.

If Kihyun’s totally sincere, the only reason why he hasn’t broken Minhyuk’s legs is because he was useful enough to put a name is such pretty face, but now how Kihyun _faces_ that pretty face is a mystery.

He spent the whole week pestering Minhyuk to spit out what ‘ _the hell’_ did he tell to Changkyun, but the elder assured him multiple times he said nothing wrong to him but if he comes that week, then Kihyun needs to greet him properly, because Changkyun now knows he wants to be friends, ‘or something more’ Minhyuk has whispered under his breath.

He doesn’t know if Minhyuk’s words are really worthy of trust but being the only one of them who had enough balls to man up and go to talk with Changkyun, then the younger – for three years, as Minhyuk explained before – doesn’t have a problem with Kihyun and his stares and his inexplicable desire to become his friend.

The next Friday after Minhyuk and Cute—Changkyun’s conversation, Kihyun is a nervous mess. Every tic-tac of the wall clock is driving him crazy, the hours feel like millenniums, the minutes like centuries and as soon as the clock signalled 6pm, Kihyun feels the anxiousness growing in him harder. He tries to distract his mind by “cleaning” the counter, even helping Hyunwoo with the coffee orders, and wiping the tables when Hyungwon was distracted. Kihyun’s tense even though he has no reason to be.

Friends? Kihyun has no problems making new friends or having a good relationship with other people or talking with people he has never seen before. His friends are very loud, very crazy – yes, Hyungwon and Hyunwoo too- and their conversation flows smoothly, every second together is a second more of happiness in his life. He’s still on good terms with his ex-girlfriends and talks a lot with them, he talks easily with his classmates. Awkwardness? That doesn’t exist in Kihyun’s dictionary. He’s a good conversationalist, always trying to fill any silence with non-sense conversations, usually letting his companion talk more, asking about them, their dreams, their interests and always attempting to make it good for them and in that manner, he gets his good amount of fun too.

He remembers his first day of high school, when both Minhyuk and Hyungwon decided to skip class and ‘forgot’ to tell him. He remembers being alone in a classroom and sitting with the only guy who was still alone. He remembers how scared everyone was of this guy for his cold stares and ironic- mostly hateful- replies, but as soon as Kihyun spoke to him, they clicked immediately seeing how much they had in common. He remembers getting attached to ‘Min Yoongi’ the whole year even though his childhood friends seemed to hate how close they became, and even now after years Yoongi still belongs to the list of his favorite people in the whole universe.

He remembers his first day of University as well and sitting next to the genius kid Kim Namjoon, and despite how smart this man was, they were inseparables for years.

He remembers every time his friends have pushed him to blind dates and how awkward he thought it could be and yet they ended very well, most of the girls falling in love with him or at least giving him their number for a second date.

The point is… he has no problem with meeting new people but talking face to face with Changkyun? The only thought of it twitches his stomach in a painful, nervous way.

After half past six Kihyun gives up. Maybe Changkyun’s actually disgusted by him, maybe Minhyuk scared him enough to not show up anymore? Maybe he lied and ‘Changkyun’ isn’t even his real name, maybe…

Kihyun’s looks up when someone opens the door, thankfully he’s already behind the counter when the two new customers – _girls_ \- enter in the Coffee shop.

Kihyun’s playful, he loves the attention female customers give to him, if they flirt he doesn’t have any problem with flirting back and when one of the pretty girls giggles when he winked, he doesn’t find any problem asking for her phone number.

Yeah, he feels empty with his one-night stands, but that doesn’t mean he can’t enjoy the pleasure of the casual sex if they don’t say no.

Sadly – or thankfully – when he’s about to ask for her phone number, the door opens again and the breath gets stuck in his lungs when a very known figure appears behind it.

If he’s totally sincere, a good fuck lost its value when those hesitant puppy eyes meet his own through the two girls in line. Changkyun looks so small in that oversize sweater and maybe a little bit tinier than the prior week. He’s so fucking worried but so happy at the same time for the only reason of Changkyun’s arrive.

As fast as he can, Kihyun attends the two girls, giving their order to Hyunwoo and pushing him to prepare the coffee _faster_ discretely, the tall man at first was confused for Kihyun’s sudden change of mood but understood the situation as soon as his eyes landed on the younger man, and smirking diabolically he takes _his fucking time._ Shit, Minhyuk’s corrupting that sweet boy so much.

The girls, however, don’t go to take a table, deciding to stay there instead in front of him and trying to initiate conversation with the unresponsive boy again. Miserably for them, the auburn haired man replies with short answers, making obvious Kihyun lost the interest in those girls almost immediately.

Five _fucking_ whole minutes later Hyunwoo finishes his coffee, even taking the time to draw a small heart in both of their cups and glaring at his older friend, Kihyun gives them their coffee and not-so-kindly bids them goodbye.

Changkyun approaches him silently while his eyes are still glued to the floor, and despite this already is part of their usual routine, Kihyun can’t help but feel a little bit disappointed for the lack of acknowledgment from the younger boy, didn’t Minhyuk tell him he want to befriend him?

“Welcome to…”

“Hi.”

Kihyun’s a little bit startled when he hears that characteristic deep voice greeting him and does literally nothing to hide his surprise from his face, and despite the elder man knows he should be the one talking first, _greeting_ him, he’s also so fucking joyful Changkyun actually wanted to talk with him and that Minhyuk didn’t ruin everything with his imprudent behavior.  

“Hello.”

There’s an awkward silence between them after Kihyun greets him back, and Kihyun hates it, he hates he can’t be himself in front of Changkyun, he doesn’t _know_ how to be himself in front of Changkyun and it’s frustrating.

“… How has been your week?”

Changkyun finally stares at him, a little bit confused by the sudden question, but doesn’t take a lot to offer Kihyun a little shy smile when he registers his question and his obvious innuendo to keep talking.

“Could’ve been better but it’s nice to be back here, I guess?”

“I’m… glad… I mean, I’m not glad you didn’t have a good week but I’m glad you’re back here… I mean… _ugh_.”

At Kihyun’s embarrassed behavior, Changkyun chuckles softly, covering his mouth with the paws of his sweeter to not let the elder see him laughing but too late and the elder wishes he could take a plane to Japan or Mart or something farther away. His whole face is turning red and seeing his friends witnessing the whole interaction he feels double embarrassment showering his body.

“It’s… hehe… okay.”

“I… Damn, I’m sorry I’m not usually this awkward, I swear.”

“You’re funny.”

No, Kihyun’s not funny, he’s lame and embarrassing and he’s making a fool of himself in front of… What? This nice, pretty customer he definitely _doesn’t_ have a crush on?

“What can I get you today?”

“An Americano, please.”

Kihyun smiles tenderly at himself, knowing his order as the back of his hand and yet asking him for the only reason to talk and spend more time with him. The brown haired man turns to tell Hyunwoo to prepare the coffee and _‘Please, this time take your fucking time’_ and then again Hyunwoo smirks playfully but does as Kihyun said.

“Soooo, will you stay today?”

“Of course, I like here.”

“I--- thank you, I appreciate it.”

“You’re welcome, but it’s only the truth. This place helps me to relax, I can’t help coming back here every week.”

“You can keep coming as much as you want, I--- we will glad to receive you…”

Changkyun wanted to ask something but just in that moment Hyunwoo decides to have his coffee ready _fast_ and putting it in front of Kihyun. Damn, he’s starting to hate this big man and his teasing smirk so much.

“It’s $3 sir.”

“Ah yeah…”

Changkyun starts looking into one of his pockets but almost immediately the colors leave his face as soon as he looks into the other. Kihyun blinks confused seeing the younger man looking desperately into his back pockets too and when their eyes meet, the regret and the shame is evident in his face.

“Sorry I…”

“You don’t have the money?”

“I’m really, really sorry! I--”

“It’s okay, you can…”

“No, no, it’s not okay. I’m really sorry, I swear I had the money this morning, I don’t…” – Kihyun raises an eyebrow when realization comes into Changkyun’s mind and he panics seeing the coffee already made in front of him – “Shit, I’m really sorry okay? I had the money but I had to… ugh.”

“Hey, it’s okay you really don’t need to worry.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize anymore please, I told you it’s okay.”

Convincing Changkyun to stay and take the fucking coffee is more difficult than Kihyun anticipated, it’s obvious the younger man wants it, _needs_ it desperately but he’s so fucking stubborn, so not giving Kihyun the chance to stop him, Changkyun turns around and walks fast to the exit, apologizing one more time.

Minhyuk stares at him, screaming to follow him with his eyes and Kihyun has no other option but take the coffee (and a piece of chocolate cake while he is at it) and follows Changkyun as quick as he can. Damn, that guy really is running now.

“Changkyun! Wait Changkyun, oh my god Changkyun! Slow down!”

Kihyun calls for him out loud, yet Changkyun’s too far away to hear his voice, but a couple of meters later, when the younger man realizes Kihyun’s trying to catch him, he slows down his pace to let the brown haired man reaches for him. Patting and exhausted, Kihyun tries to be as fast as his short legs allow him and when he’s in front of Changkyun, said man looks at the edge of a panic attack. Kihyun really doesn’t want that.

“Listen, I told you I’m so---”

“Take this, it is yours.” – Kihyun pushes the little box and the coffee into Changkyun’s hands but the younger’s already shaking his head rejecting his offer desperately and trying to give the gift back to its owner.

“Don’t pity me, please. Listen, when I have money I’ll buy it by myself but for now, I can’t afford it.”

“Who is talking about pitying someone? Ohhhh you thought I was giving you this _for free_? No, _hell_ no, I can’t do that, it’s not good for my business. I’m not gifting this coffee to you, you’ll pay me the next time you come and this… this cake is… hmm… an exchange!”

Kihyun feels the embarrassment again turning his cheeks crimson and showering his whole body in shame, but he’s not taking his words back, especially for how hungry Changkyun looks and how much Kihyun desires to feed him right now.  

“Really? An exchange? And what are we exchanging? What do you want in return?”

“I give you this cake if you… hmm… stay someday longer and talk with me?”

“Sorry?”

“Excuse me, this is _so_ stupid. I just want to give this to you, you don’t need to pay me, just… let’s be friends?”

“So, it’s true? You _really_ want to be my friend?”

“It is weird?”

_“A lot.”_

The boy- Changkyun, as he’s not used to call him still, lets out a little shy giggle and takes the cake with him, opening the box and gasping noticing is the chocolate cake he has been craving since a long time ago. Kihyun smiles tenderly when he notices the glitter in his eyes, showing how happy a simple gesture made the younger man so happy.

“Thank you for the cake and I’d love to be your friend if you promise you won’t give me anything else for free again, it’s not fair for you and your business, as you said. Kihyun, right? Glad to finally meet you.”

“How do you know my name?”

“Your friend mentioned it before, also he said some interesting things too…”

“I’m gonna kill him.”

“Don’t kill him please, he loves you too much. Now, I need to go, I’m late for work, see you soon?”

“Yeah, see you.”

As Changkyun bids his goodbye again, this time properly, Kihyun goes back to the coffee shop with a stupid smile plastered in his face, a warm feeling in his stomach and a heart beating strangely fast. He blames the rush from before.

But as soon as he see his crazy--- crazier best friend he remembers what Changkyun told him not a long time before and ignoring the couple of customers in the shop he shouts a _‘Lee Minhyuk come here you mother fucker! What did you tell to Changkyun._ ’

But Kihyun’s answered by a diabolic smirk and that worries him severely, nothing good could happen if Lee Minhyuk has _that_ face.

He spends the rest of the day chasing after him until he tells him everything.

Is it necessary to even mention he got nothing out of his best friend’s mouth?

 

**~*~**

 

“Soooo, what were you saying about Hoseok needing a job?” - Kihyun asks, even though his words sounded more like a complaint than an actual question.

Today has been probably one of the busiest days he has ever had in his whole lifetime and when the clock clicked 11pm he only wants to go back home and sleep.

His day started around 5am - which is nothing _too_ strange - getting up to take his puppy for a walk, then returning to his apartment to prepare breakfast and take a bath. Later, he ran until the coffee shop to open the door for Mr. Choi, Jooheon, Myungjun and Jinwoo to take their first turn, scurried to his classes afterwards, where he had two exams, a presentation and fought with a professor’s assistant for giving him a bad score. But his day didn’t finish there, he went back to the Café to let the others know their shift finished and him, Hyungwon and Minhyuk would take it from there– Because Hyunwoo called sick in the morning-.

The coffee shop was busier that day, a big amount of couples entered, the whole Football team from the local high school decided to celebrate their victory there, some girls tried to flirt with him, and even though they were gorgeous, Kihyun was too tired to react to their obvious innuendos. Then around 6pm the massive food order came and Kihyun was extra busy counting that everything was accounted for, so he leaves the Coffee shop in hands of his best friends.

It feels like an eternity that day and when Kihyun’s finally able to close the shop, he was the happiest man alive.

“We seriously could use some good help, _for real._ Please Kihyun, hire him or someone else, I really don’t care!” – Hyungwon complains a little bit behind him, feeling exhausted as well after taking care of all the tables alone, Minhyuk doesn’t complain out loud but he’s quiet and that’s all the younger men need to know he’s as tired as them.

“You could… I don’t know… ask Kyunnie for help.”

“Excuse me but… what the hell is a _’Kyunnie’_??”

“Well you know, Changkyun, Changkyunnie, _Kyunnie_ , get it? It’s a cute way to call your crush, you know? You should use it the next time and see how he reacts.”

_“I don’t have a crush on him!”_

“Riiiiighht.”

Kihyun’s not precisely in the mood to stay there and hear his best friends mocking and teasing him, so to not exploit and kick them, as soon as they’re out of the shop he bids his goodbyes and walks in the direction of his apartment without gazing behind once.

The nigh is quiet despite living in the big city. Most people are already on their way home, shops are closed, cars are every minute less frequent in the streets and Kihyun’s thankful he can walk serenely after the rush of the day.

When he sees his building while shortening the way from the park, Kihyun’s thankful his parents gifted him an apartment so close to his workplace. Only imagining filling the bathtub with hot water and taking a long bath sounds so amazing for him right now. He already ate in the Café, so after feeding his puppy he could go directly to bed.

Kihyun doesn’t know what distracted his attention away from the prominent structure but when he’s almost reached his building, his home, he turns around and lays his gaze in the only occupied bench.

Despite the distance and the darkness, Kihyun can recognize his features, his lightly long nose and those chubby-bitable cheeks, and those brown eyes he’s really in love with – No homo implied, though - but although the younger man looks serene under the moon, letting its light excel his beauty, something in Changkyun looks odd. There’s some weird-gloomy aura around his new friend and something awful twists in his stomach, while an imaginary force pulls his legs direction to him and ignoring how much his exhaustion is protesting this new develop of events. Kihyun just cannot leave him alone there.

Kihyun jogs through a small part of the park to stand next to the younger man, but it’s obvious for his lost gaze that Changkyun didn’t realize he’s not alone anymore. Now he’s having a close view of his face, Kihyun can distinguish several emotions in Changkyun’s expression, sadness and loneliness, maybe anger but he’s not completely sure, he still doesn’t know Changkyun that well.

Seeing no benefit to be standing next to a boy who doesn’t acknowledge his presence, Kihyun closes the little distance between him and the bench and sits next to Changkyun, not too close to no scare the younger man, still when a gentle hand travels to his shoulder, Changkyun seems as if he saw a ghost or something – “Kihyun!”

“Sorry, but you looked like if your mind was traveling around the universe.”

Regardless of Changkyun’s previous state, he still offers Kihyun a huge smile and finally after all those weeks of looking at the boy from afar he realizes Changkyun has nice-looking dimples and also the purest, most welcoming, friendliest smile Kihyun has ever seen in his life. The elder man smiles back, pushing his worry to the bottom of his mind and trying to cheer the boy up without prying into his life… too much.

“Yeah, sorry, I wasn’t expecting to see someone else here, especially _at this hour…_ especially _you._ Kihyun, why are you out so late? It is so dangerous! _”_

“I could say the same thing for you.”

“Oh yeah, I got stuck at work and didn’t realize it was this late already.”

“Can say the same thing I guess. What do you mean ‘especially me’ don’t you want to see me? Oorrr…”

“No! It’s nothing like that! I just didn’t think I would see you so soon.”

“Well, if I’m totally sincere, me neither, we usually see each other on Friday nights…”

“ _Wooow_ , you already memorized my scheduled visits.” – Changkyun lets out an awkward chuckle, scratching his neck to emphasize his embarrassment, that’s cute in Kihyun’s opinion – “Should I be honored you anticipate my visits or embarrassed I’m always going there the same day at the same hour that makes you notice it?”

“I… don’t think you should feel embarrassed.”

Changkyun smiles again and that’s all Kihyun needs to sit closer to the younger man. Maybe Changkyun didn’t realize or tries his best to pretend he doesn’t, but his body ‘unconsciously’ shifts closer to Kihyun in search of warmth. It may be half-May and summer is already around the corner but it’s chilling and Kihyun can’t avoid his over-protective instinct to realize what Changkyun’s wearing is doing nothing to cover him properly from the cold.

“I think I never thanked you properly for the coffee and the cake from the other day.  Thank you so much, they were delicious.”

“You’re welcome, but please _, pleaseeeee_ don’t remind me about that day, that was embarrassing.” -  Kihyun feels his cheeks heating up with that memory and covers them with his hands, trying to hide the blush creeping up in his face, but Changkyun giggles – he fucking giggled! – taking one of his hand into his and poking with the other the elder’s cheek muttering a soft ‘cute’ almost inaudible for Kihyun.

“… I like to go there, it’s a nice place.”

“Thank you, I like when you go…” - Kihyun swears he’s not imagining the smirk crossing for a millisecond Changkyun’s face and the brown haired bites his lips when he realizes what he just said.

 “ _Really_?”

“… What are you doing here?”

Kihyun’s not stupid to not realize Changkyun noticed his obvious attempt to change the topic, but at least he’s considerate enough to drop the subject and follow Kihyun. Kihyun can’t help but notice Changkyun’s still holding his hand and he’s not making any effort to let him go, so he decides to not ask for his hand back either, it is so comfy there anyway.

“Counting the stars.”

Kihyun looks up at the sky and he could agree the night is beautiful but raising one of his eyebrow, he turns back to glance at the younger man as if he grew two new heads… or as if he already lost the only one he has - “There’s none.”

“You’re right. The moon seems sad and lonely today without stars to make her company, only the clouds and the deep darkness.”

Changkyun smiles again, this time the sadness is almost palpable and Kihyun’s heart breaks in miles of pieces only looking at his face. Kihyun doesn’t know what to say, so he stays quiet staring at Changkyun and feeling how his heart beats painfully into his chest.

“You know that story? About the moon and the sun?”

“Huh? A Story?”  

“More like an old myth.”

“No, I d-don’t know it.”

“Well the story goes like this. The moon and the sun were secret lovers. The moon looked at the sun as the bright in her life, as the centre of his existence, she thought without him she couldn’t exist, while the sun looked at her as the calmness he wanted and desperately craved.

For days, months, years, centuries, millenniums they were really happy and very much in-love but the only wish they had was to be together at least for a complete day. Sadly when the Sun woke up every day, the moon was making her way out to rest. The moon was usually lonely and sad and cried when she thought no one was seeing her, but the sun was always looking after her, so one normal day when she opened her eyes a night, the sun let for her little balls of sunshine in the sky, saying she needed to count them all to know how much and for how long he will love her, and she realized it would take her an eternity and yet it’s still too short. They can’t be together but when she looks at the stars she will know the Moon loves her and she’ll never be alone.”

“It’s a nice story but you know there’s no way the moon and the sun could be lovers right? They’re just…”

“I know Kihyun, it’s just a story but the meaning behind it’s what matters.” – Kihyun doesn’t need to look at the younger man’s face to know he’s rolling his eyes, _so hard_ – “Isn’t it sad? Sometimes people who love each other can’t be together.”

“Sorry if I’m imprudent for what I’m going to ask, but that’s why you look so sad tonight? D-did you find your moon? That girl you feel in love? You can’t be in love with her? A… umh… forbidden love?”

Changkyun stares at Kihyun for few awkward seconds before bursting in laugh, letting go his hand to hold his stomach for how hard he is laughing now. Kihyun doesn’t understand why, though, the question was very appropriate in the situation… brat.

“No Ki, I can see your mind working in miles per hour but you don’t need to worry, as I said, it’s just a story.”

“Yes, it is sad.” - Kihyun agrees with his last question, even though he bets Changkyun already forgot he did it, still pouting at Changkyun’s last few giggles until he’s finally quiet again.

A comfortable silence falls between them. Without noticing they’re sitting so close to each other than his arms are brushing but none of them make a single move to push away. It is nice, Changkyun’s nice and right now, spending time with him feels like a miracle given from heaven.

“Thank you Ki.”

Kihyun blinks, confused, but smiles nevertheless, wrapping his arm around the younger’s shoulder. He does this to everyone, for him this is only a normal friendly gesture but for some reason when he does this with Changkyun it feels different, maybe it’s because they’re not _that_ close yet - “I don’t think I did something that big to deserve your gratitude, but you’re welcome.”

“Believe it or not, you did. You accompanied me here even though I can see your tiredness from far away and you stayed here to hear my silly story. I don’t think you realize but I invented everything few seconds ago, I don’t even know if something like that exits but I think it was nice?”

“Yes, it was and I liked it. It’s a good metaphor for forbidden love. You like music right? I heard you’re majoring there, you can write a song about the moon and the sun and their impossible love.”

“Yeah… Yeah someday I would and you’ll be the first one to listening it.”

“Wow, I feel really honored right now, I would love to.”

Changkyun chuckles, gets up and stretches his back for how long he has been sitting there on the bench - “I need to go now Ki, I’m glad I saw you tonight.”

Changkyun starts walking away but Kihyun gets up as well and grabs his hand to make him stop - “W-Wait Kyunnie. See you tomorrow? Please? I know its Wednesday but a couple of minutes?”

Maybe Kihyun’s imagining it, maybe it’s impossible considering they’re almost completely in full darkness and only the moon brightening their way, but he’s not crazy and Changkyun’s definitively blushing - “Sure, I’ll do my best to be there.”

Kihyun sits alone in the park watching Changkyun walk away. It’s weird but as he enters in his apartment he feels his heart again screaming to him to go and follow Changkyun, that he needs more than only few minutes of company and even though he wants to do what his heart is telling him, he just can’t.

He just hopes he’ll see Changkyun again the next day.

 

 

As promised, around noon Changkyun enters in the coffee shop taking by surprise not only Kihyun but also Hyungwon and Minhyuk, and when he approaches the elder man, he’s using one of the biggest smiles in the world.

“Ki, hello~”

“Kyunnie, you came!” – He can see his elder best friend from the other side raising one of his eyebrows at the mention of that embarrassing nickname, but he ignores his gesture, giving again his full attention to the younger man.

“Obviously I came! You asked me, right? I don’t have much time today, though.”

Kihyun doesn’t want to look so disappointed but he just can’t lie and his little pout tells everything the younger needs to know. Changkyun laughs a little bit, searching something into his pockets and giving it to Kihyun.

“An Americano please, and this, take the money from the other time.”

“Of course.”

As always, Kihyun tells Hyunwoo the coffee he needs to prepare and immediately turns around to talk with Changkyun a little bit more. This time Changkyun’s looking at him directly to his eyes and this time Kihyun doesn’t feel like the nervousness would eat him alive. This is so nice.

“So, are you my Hyung?”

“I think so, I’m twenty-four.”

_“Kihyunnie-hyung~”_

“Oh. My. God.”

Changkyun doesn’t tell him a lot about himself, but Kihyun doesn’t push him either, thinking maybe he needs to gain his trust first. He only tells Kihyun he’s twenty-one, loves Hyunwoo’s coffee too much and could drink it at least three times a day if he could, he has sweet-tooth and loves music, that’s all he knows about ‘Im Changkyun’ and for the brown haired man, that’s enough.

 

**~*~**

 

After that accidental meeting in the park, Kihyun’s blissful to say now Changkyun’s one of his new friends, officially. The younger is a mysterious boy, Kihyun still doesn’t know a lot about him after two week straight meeting him almost in daily basics, but he’s a nice, friendly, lovely friend with whom he can talk about anything in particular and still never get bored.

His visits are sporadic, sometimes he only can stay until his coffee is ready and Kihyun bids him goodbye, sometimes Changkyun would stay the twenty minutes his break lasts and even though he doesn’t order anything during the whole time, he enjoys just sitting next to the elder to talk, and sometimes they meet outside the coffee shop when the younger once again leaves his workplace late colliding exactly with the time Kihyun’s closing.

Even after more than two weeks talking with Changkyun, Kihyun knows very little of the younger man. He knows Changkyun works but doesn’t know where or what does he do. Also knows Changkyun lived all his life with his mother but doesn’t know where she is now or where his father is. He knows Changkyun loves music and sings and raps and Kihyun may as well admit he’s enamored with the younger’s deep voice. He knows or suspects he’s a student for how young he is, but the younger never talks about his classes or classmates. He knows Changkyun lives near him but doesn’t know exactly where. Changkyun’s a friendly man but Kihyun has never seen a friend around, Changkyun never talks about having one at all, only about his coworkers but sometimes he spends his whole shift alone. He knows Changkyun feels alone and Kihyun wants to do anything in his power to erase the loneliness in his life, especially for how full his life became with the younger’s presence.

Changkyun’s the type of guy who likes to hear Kihyun instead of talking about himself, and even if it’s frustrating from time to time, he’s exactly like Kihyun. Sometimes when Kihyun tries to ask something related to his life, nothing too private, Changkyun changes the topic quickly and he’s not exactly _that_ discrete about it.

But it’s okay, they still have a lot of time to know about each other and Kihyun’s just satisfied with the younger man’s company.

Kihyun stares impatiently at the wall clock, waiting for the minutes to pass faster. It’s Friday and he knows today Changkyun has more time to spend with him, so he happily cleans everything that needs to be cleaned, attend the little line of customers faster and order his friends to stop teasing him for at least a night _‘You assholes are embarrassing me in front of him! Shut your fucking mouths for at least a night and I’m inviting you for pizza!’_ but he knows of course they won’t obey even if he bribes them.

Around a quarter past six, Changkyun enters the coffee shop and as soon as his eyes meet Kihyun’s the younger shows a wide smile, waving at him excitedly and striding his way faster to be by the elder man’s side. Kihyun’s heart skips a beat when instead of his usual spot in front of the counter, Changkyun decides to walk directly to Kihyun’s side and envelops him into his arms and hug the elder man tightly muttering a soft ‘I missed you’ after two days away from him.

“You’ve been extra busy Kyunnie, I hope you’re sleeping and eating well.”

“I am, Hyung! Stop mothering me please.” – It’s impossible for Kihyun to not worry about the young man, especially for how tired and how thin he has been looking those past few days but Kihyun, once again, tries to not pry further.

“So, how has been your week?”

“Fine I guess? Nothing new. What about you Hyung? Did a lot of customers flirt with you today?”

“Ehh…”

“At least one every hour.” – Hyunwoo comments when he passes one of the orders to Hyungwon. The short brunet sends arrows on fire in Hyunwoo’s direction but the elder man seems unfazed for the obvious threatening aura around Kihyun.

“I see, Hyung’s a popular guy, huh?”

“You don’t know how much!” – Hyungwon says as he approaches the trio, taking the cup of coffee, smirking when he sees the obvious embarrassment in his best friend – “I don’t understand why though. He’s short and grumpy, his face is nothing too spectacular, he has been working out but he’s mostly skin and bones…”

“Maybe because Hyung is really pretty. If you look closely at his face, his skin is very pale and smooth, without any apparent scar, his eyes are brown and so gentle-looking, his lips are naturally rosy and those bitable cheeks would drive any girl crazy, especially for how pretty his blush is. Also Kihyunnie is not short, excuse you, we’re the same height, and for girls, they prefer someone they can look at his eyes and not getting sore in their necks for staring up for so long…”

“Wow, Changkyunnie if you keep talking Kihyun will find a way to fly to Jupiter. Please, tell us more.” – Minhyuk comments, joining the little group for a good gossip and a perfect opportunity to mock at his short best friend.

_“Ugh, guys.”_

It’s true. As Changkyun keeps talking to him, his neck, cheeks and ears turn every time redder and at some point he really wants to run away. But it’s nice the way Changkyun talks about him and how serious he looks defending Kihyun’s honor from his so-called friends.

Kihyun, as a silent thanks, wraps his arm around the younger man, bringing him to his side and smiling proudly at him.

“Well, if you _really_ think Kihyun is _that_ pretty now, you should’ve seen him when he had pink hair.”

Kihyun stares in horror how Minhyuk takes his phone out of his pocket to show Changkyun a part of his dark past. Kihyun tries to take the phone from Minhyuk’s dangerous hand, but Changkyun, yes, _Changkyun_ wraps his hands around his waist and somewhat hug him from behind preventing any further movement from the brown haired man… because the younger is stronger than he looks like and not because Kihyun stands frozen between his arms.

And before Kihyun can’t get out of the Changkyun trance he got into, the culprit finds one of his old pictures and shows it to the black haired man.

_‘Oh no’_

“Hyyyuung, you were so cute!! Why didn’t you keep it? The pink looks fantastic on you.” – Changkyun squeezes his slim figure while cooing embarrassingly out loud and even though that should piss Kihyun off, he actually giggles.

“I’m not… I didn’t… do you like it?”

“Of course! The color excels your features so well.”

“Thank you, but I preferred purple.”

“Did you have purple hair too?!!” – Changkyun looks excitedly at Minhyuk still with Kihyun in his arms, waiting for him to show him some old pic or something, but at Minhyuk’s lack of movement, Changkyun pouts and _begs_ – “Hyung, pleaseeeeeeeeeeee.”

“Okay, but only if you stop flirting in front of us.”

“We are no…”

“Deal.”

Kihyun looks at Changkyun behind him as he can, questioningly when the fuck they started flirting but as soon as the pic is in front of his face, the younger squeezes Kihyun again, ignoring his confused gaze, and this time hides his face in the crook of his neck – “Hyyyyuung, you’re adorable!!!”

Around them the group makes puking sounds and Kihyun shouts at them to go back to work leaving the two of them alone.

“You can let me go now, you know?”

“But you’re so small and cute and huggable Hyung!”

“No, I’m not. Shoo shoo.”

After few complains, Changkyun lets him go with a childish pout and Kihyun can’t help but pinch those cute chubby cheeks chuckling when the skin turn red, he’s already really fond of this guy – “You can hug me whenever you want, I don’t mind.”

Kihyun can almost hear Minhyuk’s voice shouting across the room a loud _‘You_ _liar!_ ’ and Hyungwon’s ‘ _You don’t like people touching you!_ ’ but only their flabbergasted eyes staring at him with raises eyebrows tell everything by themselves.

The brown haired man runs to look into the changing room for a chair for Changkyun and motions him to sit next to him behind the counter, while he’s busy attending a nice-looking couple. Changkyun stays there in silence until Kihyun’s done with his work, admiring the passion the elder has in his job, and as soon as the lovers leave them alone, he takes the chance to get Kihyun’s attention again.

“Hyung, remember the story I told you about the moon and the sun?”

“How could I forget it? It was beautiful.”

“Well, I remembered every once in a while the moon overlaps the sun, so I was thinking, what if the stars are the product of their love every time an eclipse happens?”

“Are you implying the sun and the moon had sex? Because I can’t imagine the sun with a hard on.”

Kihyun can clearly see Hyunwoo blinking confused and at the same time trying _his best_ to ignore their conversation while he’s preparing the new order of coffee. Changkyun, in the other way around giggles, while his ears turn red with the implication. So cute.

“Oh my god, I was trying to be romantic here!”

“Well, the moon and the sun should’ve fucked a lot to have so many kids.”

“Hyung!” – Changkyun lets out a rather loud, lunatic laugh with that comment, even holding his stomach for the hard force of his laugh is and Kihyun smiles, seeing the real joy in the younger’s face.

“Well, my story has been ruined by the rotation of the earth, what else should I use? The sky and the ocean?”

“The sky and the ocean? Something mega cheesy and cringe-worthy like ‘Between the sky and the ocean there’s no place where I can hide the love I feel for you’ ah, I don’t know, chessiness is not my comfort zone.”

“Wow, that was actually kind of cute. Hyung is a romantic really really really deep inside, heh.”

“Romantic? Me? No, hell, _no_.”

“I bet you’re the type of guy who do something wrong and go to your knees holding your beloved one’s hand apologizing, or the one who brings the breakfast to the bed and feed…”

“Dare to tease me one more time and I’m gonna use a kitchen knife to cut off your balls, little shit.” – There it is again, Kihyun letting the dark side of himself threaten his friends, but Changkyun seems unbothered by the empty threat, chuckling again at Kihyun’s annoyed but very cute face.  

“There’s nothing wrong with being a hopeless romantic Hyung~”

“Ugh, you’re as annoying as Minhyuk. Told you…”

Kihyun stares in pain how the younger lets out a disappointed sighs and gets up of the chair with a little pout, wrapping his arms around Kihyun’s shoulders and instinctually the elder’s rounds his waist with his own.   

“I’m sorry, I need to go now Hyung, today I’m covering a friend and I need to get back soon.”

The brunet can’t hide his disappointment even though he tries. He had so many plans for today knowing the younger man has a little bit of free time. He wanted to keep him there until they can close the shop and invite Changkyun to dinner, maybe ask him if he wanted to meet Gigi and cook dinner for him while he is at it, maybe later ask him to spend the night together and at least be sure Changkyun will be fine for the night. Everything’s ruined now.

“Really? It’s not even seven yet.”

“I know, ugh, I hate my job now.”

“I hate your job too, you don’t know how much.”

Changkyun finally lets him go, smiling lovingly at Kihyun’s obvious sadness, cupping his cheeks between his hands when the elder tries to look away – “Hey, don’t look at me like that, maybe we can spend more time together tomorrow? What about it?”

“I’d love to.” – Kihyun smiles, because that’s the only way Changkyun would leave the shop without a heavy weight in his shoulders. The elder hates how clingy he acts around Changkyun, always wanting to spend more time with him, but he can’t help it, he really, really likes Changkyun. In a friendly way of course.

Changkyun turns around, walking defeatedly to the front door, but before he can exit the shop, Kihyun shouts for him in an attempt to stop him. The younger man turns around with a confused face as Kihyun approaches him with something in his hands - “Here, have this.”

Any smile Changkyun could have disappeared, turning in a line when he notices the item Kihyun’s holding is one of the sandwich they sell there, much to his displeasure - “Hyung, I can’t accept it.”

“Please.”

“You promised it, you won’t give me anything for free, you won’t pity me.”

“It’s nothing like that Kyun, it’s just a friend looking after another friend, I care about you a lot, and you look tired and hungry and I just can’t let you go like that. Please, only to help me sleep better at night? Or to make me happy? Do you want to make me happy? Please accept my gift.”

Changkyun doesn’t look all that happy about Kihyun’s gift, but he nods nevertheless, taking the sandwich with him and turns around to finally leave for his shift.

“ _‘We’re not dating’_ you said.” – Minhyuk’s behind him smirking teasingly but Kihyun ignores him, walking away to the counter.

“We’re not. How many times I need to tell you I’m not gay.”

“Maybe until you can convince yourself you don’t feel a little tingle in your heart every time Changkyun’s next to you.” – Kihyun wanted to tell him he doesn’t feel anything like that, but Minhyuk’s already turning around to attend another table.

 

 

Three days, Changkyun hasn’t came into the coffee shop for three whole days and Kihyun’s at the edge of panicking and already planning to go into every hospital asking if he’s there. He knows he’s overacting a little bit, he probably offended the younger giving him something to eat and that’s why he doesn’t want to go, maybe he doesn’t like Kihyun anymore and wants to keep some space away from him, maybe…

“You’re pouting again, stop it, you’re scaring our customers.” – Hyungwon slaps his head softly, chuckling when Kihyun glares at him.

“Can’t help it, I’m worried.”

“You’re _always_ worried when it’s related to Changkyun. Have a little faith on him, if he said he’ll come. He. Will. Come.”

“It’s been three days!”

“So? Less than a month ago he used to come once every week and he was doing just fine without you worrying like a crazy mom before he became a regular. He was fine and he’ll be fine. Maybe Changkyun’s busy.”

“Ugh, I hate when you’re right. I just can’t stop feeling what I feel and I’m _worried_.”

“I bet it’s not only ‘worry’ what you feel.”

“Ehh??”

“Nothing~” – Hyungwon turns around without muttering any other single word and Kihyun prefers to ignore him.

Kihyun tries to do his work as always, smiling here and there, flirting with some girls, mocking his friends, trying to be as normal as he can be or at least pretend to be okay.

Around five the coffee shop is really busy, all the tables are full and a little line is formed in front of the counter, Kihyun finds himself finally thinking of other thing than Changkyun. Or that’s what he thought so until the door opens again and reveals Changkyun’s exhausted face.

The younger boy has dark bags under his eyes and his hair is a complete mess and he’s not imagining, Changkyun’s thinner now, even the oversized sweater can’t hide it.  

Ignoring the little line and the few complains, Kihyun practically jumps the counter and walks directly to the younger boy. Despite the tiredness, as soon as Kihyun’s in front of him, Changkyun offers him a little smile – “Sorry… I coul—couldn’t be here sooner---”

Kihyun stares in panic how the black haired boy falls in his arms unconscious, with the force enough to send both of them directly to the floor. Kihyun stays frozen with Changkyun into his arms, not knowing what to do but only a thing is sure, there’s no way he’ll leave the younger like that.

A few people try to help them but Kihyun hugs the younger’s body tighter against him, only allowing Hyunwoo to approach him and lifting them to their feet. The taller man carries Changkyun in his arms bridal style while Kihyun runs to the back of the store to give the keys to Mr. Choi asking him to open the door the next day, then grabbing his phone and car’s keys thanking in his mind that day he had some errands to run and decided to drive instead of walk.

Before he can walk to the front door where he left Changkyun (and Hyunwoo) Hyungwon stops him, forcing him to calm down before he tries to drive - “It’s only exhaustion Kihyun, he’s not dying.”

“You said he’d take care of himself, that he will be fine, he’s clearly not!”

“And that’s not your fault, we don’t know how many problems Changkyun could have in his life, but right now he only needs a nice bed and few hours of rest and he’ll be fine and you need to relax.”

“He fainted Hyungwon, _in my arms_.”

“You can scold him tomorrow, what about it? But tonight, relax okay? Be there for him.”

Kihyun’s frightened but decides to do what Hyungwon told him, he tries his best to breath deep and calm his nerves. He orders Hyunwoo to carry Changkyun to his car, laying him in the backseats and running to the driver seat opening the door and climbing into the car.

He knew something was wrong with his Kyunnie, there’s no way he could break a promise.

 _‘His Kyunnie’_ he thought? Oh, no.

Thankfully it only takes him around five minutes to arrive at his building, now relaxed enough to pack his car and carry Changkyun to his apartment, at least he‘s strong enough to do that or the adrenaline of the moment helped a lot, but he’s proud he didn’t let Changkyun fall the whole twenty-five floors.

Gigi greets him as always as soon as he opens the door (he’s really proud of that) and he feels bad for ignoring her but he hasn’t have any other solution, walking directly to his room and laying the lifeless body in his bed.

“Kyunnie, god, you scared the shit out of me.”

Of course Changkyun doesn’t reply. Kihyun tries to not freak out when he realizes the younger man’s having a fever, he can’t do that right now, he needs to be strong and take care of his Kyunnie.

_‘Ugh, that nickname again.’_

It doesn’t feel right let the younger man sleep in those attires, it looks uncomfortable and he needs a bath to cool down the fever. Moving to the bathroom, he takes a bowl with hot water and a cloth, then walks back to his room, staring hesitantly at the lifeless body lying in his bed and sleeping peacefully, as if he doesn’t know the turmoil he’s giving to the elder man.

Well, he indeed doesn’t know it.

Kihyun has never undressed a man before but it’s not the first time he has saw a naked man (thanks to his shameless best friend, Minhyuk) but it’s not the nudeness that stuck the breath into his lungs, making it impossible for the brown haired man to breathe properly.

Changkyun’s so fucking, worrisomely thin.

“God, Changkyun-ah, what did you do to yourself?” – Kihyun says to himself, taking the cloth and start washing the younger man’s body. In his dreams, Changkyun whines a little bit but other than few annoyed sounds, the younger makes no attempt to wake up.

After cleaning his body and putting the bowl and cloth away, he dresses Changkyun with one of his fluffy-looking pajamas and lets him sleep there before going to the kitchen to prepare something to eat, pet his puppy, feed her and taking a long bath.

Kihyun has a guest room where he can sleep if he wants to, but seeing the size of his bed and how lonely and small Changkyun looks lying there that he has no other option but climb into the bed as well, leaving a little space between them and holding the younger man’s hand into his, trying to assure him he’s not alone anymore.

“I’m going to protect you Kyun, even if you don’t want me to.”

 

 

It’s around four in the morning when Changkyun wakes up disoriented and lost, not recognizing the place he is in right now. The room looks so big and organized, nothing that he’s used to, other than working few extra shifts and Kihyun’s worried brown eyes, he doesn’t remember anything of the day.

Kihyun…

Kihyun…

Kihyun’s lying next to him and he looks so adorable holding _tightly_ his hand in his sleeps.

Changkyun smiles, poking one of Kihyun’s cheeks, appreciating how nice they look right now. Sadly for him, he can’t appreciate his beauty for so long as the gentle touch wakes the elder man up immediately.

Kihyun looks as disoriented as himself a few minutes ago, but as soon as he blinks the sleepiness away and remembers Changkyun’s presence next to him, he moves to sit in the bed, facing the younger man and Changkyun gulps nervously seeing the fire in his eyes. Thankfully (for him) Kihyun relaxes his gaze almost immediately, now instead of fury, Changkyun can distinguish sadness and worry despite the room being practically dark… and that’s way worse for Changkyun.

“Kyunnie how are you feeling?”

“I’m good hyung.”

“You sure? Oh damn, you worried the shit out of me yesterday when you fainted! How dare you Changkyun?! You’re not allowed to worry me to death okay? Next time you disappear like that and faint on me, _I’m gonna kill you_.” – Despite his threat, Kihyun moves his arms around the younger’s neck and clings onto him. Changkyun, on the other hand, happily hugs him back, after so many days missing the warmth Kihyun’s body provide him.

“I’m sorry Hyung, I’ve been working extra hard the past three days, but I have a good news! I’m free today.”

Kihyun lets him go enough to look at his eyes, but then smiles widely – “Will you spend it with me? Today I don’t have any classes and Mr. Choi promised to take care of the shop in the morning.”

“That’s why I went directly to the Café yesterday, I wanted to tell you.”

Changkyun might have seen Kihyun smiling before, but nothing can’t be compared with the one he shows with the simple promise of spending the day together.

Changkyun notices the elder man looking for his phone, probably to see the hour and when he gasp a ‘It’s still four’ he throws the phone to the nightstand table and pulls the younger man’s body into his chest – “Let’s sleep until late, then I’ll prepare breakfast… or lunch, and we’ll go to the Coffee shop for a while okay? I’ll lend you some of my clothes but for now, let’s sleep a little bit more.”

Changkyun takes the chance to snuggle into the elder’s chest further, wrapping his arm around his soft tummy and letting the light snores lull him to sleep, smiling with the promise of a whole day with the person who has stolen his heart since the first time he saw the brown haired man that day in the coffee shop.

 

**~*~**

 

“You’re in a tremendously, a little bit annoying, good mood lately, Kihyun.” – Hyunwoo comments after probably hearing Kihyun humming a ballad song and weird happy-dance for at least half a day.  Hyunwoo has been staring at him as if he has lost his mind or as if he’s a fool in-love the whole day but the younger man has been so occupied in his own world to pay attention to any of his curious glances.

It’s been two days since Changkyun slept in his bed and after staying the whole day with him, without rush, without pressure, Kihyun can say the younger man has him wrapped around his finger.

Of course the next day when they were awake enough to acknowledge their surroundings, Changkyun apologized approximately fifty-nine times for collapsing in Kihyun’s arms and pushing the whole responsibility of his sick ass into Kihyun’s hands for the entire night, but the elder’s brushed the apologies away each time with a simple _‘It’s okay, I didn’t do a lot actually, you just slept’_ until Changkyun was convinced enough to drop the topic, but if Kihyun’s honest he enjoyed spending the night with Changkyun’s warmth next to him and he would do it again without thinking about it twice if given the chance.  

“I’m just appreciating the beauty of life.”

“Ugh… Minhyuk! Your best friend is getting gross again!” – Hyunwoo makes a disgusted face the younger man seriously doesn’t appreciate, as if Kihyun’s words stink or something, while at the other side of the shop the voice of his black haired best friend shouted a loud ‘Tell me something new please’ causing a loud laugh from the elder man, but Kihyun rolls his eyes, trying to dissimulate the smile tugging in his lips. The brunet couldn’t let go the chance of elbowing Hyunwoo in the ribs _hard_ showing him how ‘annoyed’ he was, but the taller man seemed unbothered by the force Kihyun put in it, even laughing more seeing his short friend so embarrassed with the whole face scarlet red and all. In the elder’s eyes, Kihyun looks so adorably mockable right now.

 _“_ Ugh, what a friend I have! Making fun of me… especially after _you asked_.” – Kihyun says with a small voice, turning around to pretend to ignore Hyunwoo and his teasing. What’s wrong with his friends lately and the whole ‘let’s mock Kihyun until he dies’ mood around.

“I didn’t ask anything, I just pointed the fact that you’ve been in an annoyingly good mood, that’s all.”

Kihyun sends a glare at the tall man behind him, but smiles tenderly seeing Hyunwoo’s teasing smirk turning into something more innocent-looking, a pretty smile reserved to only special occasions, so wide that his eyes almost disappeared in his face, making him look like an overgrown puppy instead of an over-muscled man, maybe even like a loving dad.

“Soooo, the reason is?”

“Nothing special I guess…”

“Nothing special, you say.”

“Stop looking at me like that, it’s creepy.” – It isn’t actually, but he’s tired of the same questioning eyes Minhyuk and Hyungwon already threw at him every day every hour.

“It’s because of that cute little boy everyone around seems to like, right?”

Shit, Hyunwoo and his amazing observation abilities he’s not appreciating right now - “Can’t you be, like, less direct or something?”

“I could, but I know you and we won’t get anywhere if I don’t ask directly, you just will keep dodging my questions until I give up.”

“You indeed know me so well.”

_“Kihyun-ah.”_

“What?”

“You’re doing it again.”

“Ugh, it’s not like I want to avoid replying to you, it’s just… okay yes, I’m in good mood because of Changkyun, but I didn’t want to say it out loud because that statement can easily be misunderstood, and I’m already tired of my so-called _‘best friends’_ mocking at me every day.”

“Well, those words are easily open to multiple possibilities, one of them is that you like the boy.”

“Oh, I actually like him a lot, as a friend --- stop looking me like that, not you too please.”

“I’m not looking at you in any special way.”

_“You. Are.”_

The elder raises his eyebrows while at the same time looking at him weirdly but suddenly Hyunwoo stops his teasing and becomes all serious again, the change setting some kind of nervousness in the brunet’s stomach - “Look Kihyun, I know if it’s not because I entered in the Café some months ago begging for a job, we probably wouldn’t have met at all in our whole life and even now I know we aren’t all that close still, but I’m not a fool or blind to my surroundings. Before you were all ‘Oh my god I hate life’ and now you are ‘Appreciating the beauty of life’ and that’s a big change Kihyun and believe it or not, I’m really happy for you.”

“You… You are?”

“Of course I am, and Minhyuk and Hyungwon, Jooheon, Myungjun, Jinwoo, also Yoongi and Namjoon, and Bin, Dongmin and Sanha, even Mr. Choi…”

“Oh god, the whole Korean population knows?”

“Only the ones that love you. So, whatever you choose, if he makes you happy, you know we’ll support you, right?”

“Why do I feel like I won’t like where this conversation is going?”

Thankfully, before Hyunwoo could reply to that, a new customer entered and they had to get back to work immediately.

The rest of the day was nothing too exciting after that. Minhyuk and Hyungwon were annoying as always, Hyunwoo teased him a little bit more after that conversation, the customers were nice as always, nothing out of ordinary.

Again, Kihyun finds himself thinking about certain raven haired boy.

After the day they spent together, he knew he couldn’t see Changkyun at least during half a week even if he wanted to. The younger told him he’ll work double shift again and probably will be too busy to go to the Coffee shop and despite feeling his gut twitching in disappointment, Kihyun didn’t say anything, only smiled at the younger and made him promise he’ll take care of himself those days or otherwise he'll let Kihyun knows if he’s having problems with something.

There’s nothing too odd about seeing the younger rolling his eyes at Kihyun’s incessant- already too overwhelming - worry and his intense desire of take care of his youngest friend, but he promised it and with his heart a little bit at ease, Kihyun can say he’s relaxed waiting for the next time he’ll see Changkyun. Hopefully sooner than later.

As routine, he closes the Coffee shop around ten in the night when there’s no other customer in, as tired as always but still in a pretty good mood. Minhyuk has nothing to say about it, already out of smartass comments for the day, and Hyungwon’s already dreaming about laying in his bed and hugging his pillow, so they let him go without another of their senseless jokes.

As usual, Kihyun walks until his apartment with a bounce in his step and a melody in his mind, humming happily the song out loud without caring about the curious gazes other citizens throw at him, while cutting a little the way striding through the lonely park in front of the apartment complex when something attracts his attention.

Feels almost like a déjà vu when Kihyun turns his gaze around to look direction to one of the bench and sees a young boy there. A very well known person called Im Changkyun. But unlike the first time, the younger careless boy is not staring at the sky giving the impression of being in a deplorable depressive state and looking like he lost someone important that day. Actually Changkyun’s not gazing anywhere, as his eyes are closed and his body seems to be sore in that position, trying to find a comfortable way to sleep in that hard wood bench like a homeless kid or a drunk man.

Kihyun feels his heart dropping to somewhere near the floor with only the sight of his… friend… and doesn’t waste any other second more only staring at the raven haired boy, practically running at his side and shaking his shoulder desperately to awaken him – “Yah, Changkyun-ah, this is not the best place to be sleeping, wake up you big slapdash fool!”

Changkyun stirs in his sleep, rubbing his eyes to wash a little bit of his tiredness and sleep away, Kihyun should be pissed and the single thought of how adorable Changkyun looks like this shouldn’t pass through his mind, he should be mad, really really mad, but still he can’t avoid the contemplation as the younger pouts as a little baby with those rosy pretty lips - “Kihyunnie-hyung? What are you doing here?”

“That’s what I should be asking! Why are you sleeping here? Didn’t you have a better place to sleep? A bed perhaps.”

Changkyun blinks confused at Kihyun as if he didn’t understand the words the elder was muttering, still more asleep than actually awake but when he registers the question in his mind, he chuckles softly, sitting better in the bench to stretch his aching back – “Can’t. My roommate called me, he has someone over and asked me to find somewhere else to sleep.”  

Fury, that’s what Kihyun feels right now, how can someone be so inconsiderate? Especially with a person like Changkyun who looks so dead with exhaustion? A person who went to class early and then work the rest of the day? Kihyun wants to find the idiot who is Changkyun’s roommate and kill him with his bare hands. Jail? It’s worth it.

“Why didn’t you go to the Café then? Or to one of your friends’ houses? Why are you sleeping on a bench? God Changkyun how could you be so careless? What if someone kidnaps you? Or kills you? Or worse? We would never know what kind of lunatics are on the streets nowadays! You _promised_ Changkyun! You promised you would take care of yourself or ask for my help…”

Changkyun bites his lower lip and looks at the other side, trying to avoid Kihyun’s accusatory gaze. The brunet wants to scold him more, share a good piece of his mind with him but seeing the defiance in the younger’s actions, Kihyun decides to let it go this time and instead of scolding him for his irrational behavior as he’s dying to do right now, he sits next to Changkyun and with a hand at the back of his head, pulls the younger man closer to his body and makes his head lie down in his shoulder, taking the chance to caress the soft locks of hair in a comforting way.

“Whatever, that doesn’t matter anymore. So, tell me Changkyun what if we go to my apartment, so you can take a bath to relax your muscles while I prepare you a fast dish, because I guess you _haven’t_ eaten yet… and you spend the night there, then tomorrow you’ll introduce me that roommate of yours so I can have a word or two with him?”

“Will you scold him?” – Changkyun asks, nuzzling his nose against the sensitive zone of Kihyun’s neck, earning a kind of awkward sound in the back of the elder’s throat that both of them preferred to ignore.

“Oh _sweetheart_ , you don’t know what I’m planning to do to him right now.”

“ _Sweetheart_?”

“That’s the only word you heard of what I just said?”

“No, but… _Sweetheart_?”

“I swear I’ll leave you here.”

“No, no, no, no Hyung~ I love when you call me that! Can I call you baby or darling or love?”

“Okay, I’m leaving, bye Changkyun-ah.”

Kihyun tries to get up and leave the culprit really there alone, but Changkyun laughs, wrapping his arms around the elder’s waist and pulls him into his orbit again. Kihyun tries to seem annoyed but he can’t keep the façade any longer when he has Changkyun in his arms laughing so freely and clinging onto him like a koala to his eucalyptus tree.

“Really Kyunnie, let’s go, it’s getting late and I want you fed and sleeping in a bed before midnight.”

“You spoil me so much Hyung~”

“Yeah, you spoiled brat.”

Changkyun unwraps his body from Kihyun unwillingly, even complaining because… _quote: Kihyun’s warm and comfy and he could hug him all day and night if possible_ … but despite his protests Changkyun lets the elder pull him to his feet and holding his hand, Kihyun drags him to his apartment.

As soon as Kihyun opens the door, his little puppy jumps into his arms… Changkyun’s arms… and the brunet looks at the scene half-hurt seeing his _daughter_ licking his guest’s face instead of his own. Still, it’s kind of funny how Changkyun’s voice goes higher—kind of child-like as if he’s talking with an actually baby instead of a puppy.

“Can’t believe you, Gigi.”

“Don’t blame her, she loves me. Right _sweetheart_? You love daddy Kyun right? Right?”  

“Riiiighhhtt… why do I feel like if you’re lightly mocking at me?”

“I don’t know what you are talking about sweet-”

“Do I need to remind you I live in the penthouse and the fall would be really, _really_ painful?”

“Naah Hyung, you like me too much to push me down.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure if I were you, now, put my girl down and go and take a bath, I’ll lend you some pajamas.”

Changkyun’s eyes wide comically when something - which seems to be really important - comes into his mind. In Kihyun’s opinion nothing seems to be _that_ significant if Changkyun doesn’t have his naked ass in the shower in the next few seconds - “Oh shit Hyung, I still haven’t returned your clothes, I swear I’ll wash them tomorrow and….”

“Keep them.” – Kihyun says cutting the younger boy’s words immediately, not leaving anything open for more discussion. He doesn’t want to stay there and keep looking at Changkyun’s inquisitive-confused eyes any longer, so Kihyun practically runs away to the security of his kitchen to prepare something for him to eat. Sadly for Kihyun, Changkyun follows him.

“I can’t do that, those are your clothes, Kihyun-hyung.”

“Really Kyun, please keep them. It’s only an old white T-shirt I rarely use, some old jeans and vans. Believe me, I don’t really like them but they look fantastic on you.”

All of sudden, Changkyun’s face turns blank, trying to not sound rude with his host but doing very little to hide his discomfort, Kihyun hates this - “Hyung, I told you, I really don’t like people…”

“If you use the word ‘pity’ one more time in my presence I’m gonna slash your neck with this kitchen knife and I won’t care about the consequences. Why do I need to tell to make you understand I don’t pity you, I just love seeing you wearing my clothes… ehh… uhhh… _oh god_.”

_‘Why did I say that?’_

“You _love_ seeing me wearing your clothes?” - At Changkyun raised eyebrow, Kihyun looks for a way to run away from there. From Changkyun. Why is he always embarrassing himself in front of the younger man? God.

“Eh? What are you talking about? Did I say something? Where’s my dog by the way? Gigi? Giiigiii?”

“You’re adorable.”

Kihyun wants to deny that, the only one adorable between them it’s Changkyun.

Changkyun saves him from any other further embarrassment and walks directly to the bathroom and shouting at him he’ll try to be really fast, so Kihyun pushes the humiliation away and looks into the refrigerator for something to cook.

After making a mental note to go buy some groceries the next day, Kihyun heats a little of the kimchi he had, makes a little bit of rice and takes the jar with orange juice from the refrigerator, then sets the table just in time to pass the pajamas to Changkyun when the younger shouted he was done.

 _This_ , arriving home together, his puppy playing with Changkyun, cooking for him while he baths, why does this domesticity feel so strangely right? So familiar? Like if Changkyun belonged right there in Kihyun’s life and Kihyun’s house (and bed, may he add).

As soon as they sat in the dinner table, Changkyun gazes at the dish in awe for few seconds, showing how hungry he was and it’s not really necessary to be a genius to notice that’s probably the first home-made plate he has eaten in quite a while. Changkyun tries to seem unbothered when he feels Kihyun’s gaze on him but the damage is already done and, as always, Kihyun has this intense desire to feed him until he can’t eat anymore or at least gain some weight back.

Knowing how the younger feels about people pitying him, Kihyun decides to shut his mouth to any commentary about Changkyun eating better and instead apologizes because he knows he could’ve done something superior if he would have the right ingredients. Changkyun looks at him as if he’s joking and instead of replying, takes his spoon to taste the food.

 “Oh my god Hyung, this is delicious!” – Changkyun takes another bite humming in pleasure with the simple meat. Kihyun chuckles seeing the younger desperately eating the whole meal, and maybe the elder doesn’t notice it, but he’s staring at the younger with a caring smile and his fondness can’t be hidden from his eyes even if he tries, it was question of time for the younger to become aware of it.

“Don’t look at me like _that_.”

“How? I’m not looking at you in any special way.”

“You’re looking at me like if you were watching your new stray cat eating food for the first time ever.”

“You’re more like a puppy though. With the eyes and the cheeks and how your imaginary tail wags, like, all the time.”

“Well, my ‘imaginary tail’ wags like that only when I see you.”

The elder man’s neck cracks painfully when he turned to stare at the younger, hearing what he said clearly but still not believing such words actually came from Changkyun’s mouth - “What?”

“ _What_?”

“What did you say?”

“Nothing?”

“ _Ugh_.”

Quickly, Changkyun decides to change the topic and Kihyun does very little to push the younger to answer his question, especially when he doesn’t want to hear what did he said again – “So, Hyung you look a lot like a hamster, you know?”

“Please, not you too!”

“Not me _what_? It’s the true though. You’re cute-sized with _those_ cheeks…”

“What’s wrong with my cheeks?! They’re normal!”

“No, they’re not normal, they are round and… and… _cute_!”

“You _really_ want me to kick you out right?”

“But if it’s the truth?!”

After that, Changkyun eats comfortably in silence and as soon he’s done Kihyun takes the plate away and sets it in the sink to wash it immediately. He might be tired but not even in a millions years he would leave something dirty in his precious kitchen.

Changkyun follows him into the kitchen again, offering his help to Kihyun to do the dishes as well or at least dry the utensils while he’s washing but the elder declines his offer kindly, not having the heart to make him ‘work’ anymore. Changkyun looks a little bit taken aback at his rejection but doesn’t fight back, knowing Kihyun has his ‘methods’ and he just can’t intervene in that.

“Thank you for the food Hyung, it was really good.”

“You’re welcome, Kyunnie. Anything you need.”

When Kihyun finishes the dishes, he pushes the younger to the living room and tells him to watch whatever is on the TV because his ‘handsome’ body also needs a good bath. Changkyun doesn’t protest but instead of picking the remote, he starts playing with Gigi.

When Kihyun’s done, clean and dressed, he goes to the living room again and his heart melts in fondness when he sees his puppy sleeping in his guest’s lap and Changkyun petting her hair affectionately. The whole sight is so cute that he wishes he has his phone or his camera to take a pic of it, of Changkyun and that tender look he has on his handsome face.

Kihyun closes the distance between them, sitting next to Changkyun and pet the head of his puppy as well - “She doesn’t like strangers, you know? She didn’t let Minhyuk pet her for two whole months after I adopted her, and she stills doesn’t like Hyungwon that much either. Then you came one day and she instantly loves you!”

“What can I say Hyung? I’m a lovable person.”

“Yes… yes, you are.”

“What?”

“Tell me, do you have something to do tomorrow night?”

“Why?”

“Answer me first!”

“After six I’m free, I don’t need to arrive home after that. Why? Are you inviting me to a date?”

“A d-d-date? No! I wanted to ask you if you could help me with some errands I have to run tomorrow, after seven is fine. If you want of course, don’t feel pressure if you don’t, it’s okay…”

_‘It’s totally a date… a friends date… hanging out with a pal, yes, that’s it.’_

“Yes Hyung, I’d love to.”

“Really? Really?! Oh, greaaaaat! Tomorrow I’ll give you the clothes you’ll wear and I don’t know, can you pick me up in the Café when you’re done with work?”

“Yes, I’ll pick you up then, and you know, I was about to reject your offer of lending me more clothes when I already have some, but because you _love_ seeing me wearing them, I’ll accept them, I guess.”

“Okay, decision made, you’ll sleep with Gigi tonight.”

Kihyun gets up with burning cheeks, but he’s not as heartless as he sounds to actually let Changkyun sleep on the floor or the couch in fact, especially when he has a bed, huge enough to let him, Hyungwon and Minhyuk share it when they sleep together in their accidental sleepovers. The little shit, however, doesn’t seem like he really mind Kihyun’s threats as he laughs, and holds his puppy muttering _‘Did you hear that? Tonight you’ll sleep with daddy Kyun sweetheart~’_

Ugh, Kihyun’s really starting to hate this man so much now.

Kihyun gets up from the couch and starts walking slowly to the main room, waiting to hear Changkyun’s begs before reaching for the bedroom’s door, but they never came. Said man actually has the idea he’ll actually sleep on the couch that night and he seems like he doesn’t mind, but Kihyun does and groaning he says – “Are you coming or not? C’mon it’s almost midnight and we need to get up early.”

“Coming!”

Changkyun puts the puppy in her little bed, cooing when Gigi protests in her sleep but other than little cries she doesn’t wake up. When Changkyun enters in the room, Kihyun’s already lying in bed, taking the side closer to the wall and leaving enough space to let Changkyun lie down next to him.

“You ready? Come and sleep Kyun, you already look a lot like a zombie and it’s not even Halloween.”

“Coming, coming.”

As Changkyun lies in the bed, Kihyun stares directly at his eyes and smiles tenderly, taking his hand and intertwining their fingers like he did when Changkyun was sick – “Next time your roommate kicks you out of your dorm, tell me, my house and my bed will always be open for you.”

The younger man smiles a little and nods, luckily he doesn’t move his hand away and instead leans closer to Kihyun’s body, muttering a soft ‘Good night Kihyunnie-hyung’ before closing his eyes and falling asleep almost immediately.

Changkyun _does_ really belong to his bed.

 

**~*~**

 

“Hyungwon-ah, can you come here for a minute, please?”

Minhyuk and Hyungwon stare at each other in confusion for the seriousness in the short brunet’s voice calling out loud from the changing room.

Ever since very early that morning, Kihyun looks like a truck full of nervousness and anxiety, tapping his foot on the floor while impatiently staring at the clock every fucking minute. They asked, of course they did, but Kihyun only said he has some ‘errands’ to run that night (bullshit!) and they’ll have to look out of the shop for him.

Both of them know, even Hyunwoo and Mr. Choi know, if Kihyun’s impatient over something, then a certain cute little boy is involved in some way.

Hyunwoo takes Kihyun’s position while Minhyuk’s in charge of all the tables as the tall model-like man walks to the back of the shop. Thankfully the Café is not that busy at that hour of the day so the two remaining men don’t have any problem attending the few customers on their own.

Hyungwon opens the door without knocking as always, expecting a scolding or something similar, but as he recalls his day in his mind he thinks he hasn’t done anything out of ordinary, except that his teasing towards the slightly elder man has been less frequent but that hardly could be a reason for him to be called out.

The sight, however, it’s nothing of what the younger man was waiting to see any time in his lifetime.

“Help me Won, _please_.”

Hyungwon stares at him confused, taken aback for his best friend’s disastrous state and how messy his clothes are. Right now even mocking at him seems to lose its value, as his whole existence is the only mock the elder man would ever need.

“Only if you tell me what’s going on and why are you… well I can’t even say you’re using make-up because that’s an offence for all the make-up artists. Better say, why you seem like you’re playing with the make-up? And you realized you buttoned your shirt wrong right?”

“Look, you can laugh at me later, but this time, please help me.”

“I don’t even want to laugh right now.”

Hyungwon skips into the room, reaching for the tense man and unbuttons the navy blue, long sleeve shirt completely, tugging it out of his skinny ripped white jeans as it made him look like a nerd, even though the combination doesn’t look all that bad.

“Do you have something to remove the make-up in this disaster?”

“Over there are wet tissues.”

“Great.”

The touch is delicate, with his index finger he pushes Kihyun’s head up making him stare directly at him, while with his other hand he starts removing the make-up. Thankfully Kihyun decided to ask for help before ruining completely his face.

“If I’m helping you with this, the least you can do is tell me where the hell are you going and don’t tell me you’re ‘running errands’ because this is _obviously_ something more.”

Hyungwon applies the base, thanking the heavens Kihyun bought the correct one even if it was his first time. Albeit if his opinion is asked, Kihyun doesn’t have anything that should be hidden, as his skin is naturally pale but still perfectly soft and smooth, without any apparent scar or something that he should be embarrassed about --- but he’d rather die than admitting something like that.

“It’s the true though, but I--- oh my god, you’re gonna tease me into my grave…”

“You are taking Changkyun with you?” – Kihyun stares at him in surprise, as if he doesn’t believe Hyungwon has actually said those words out loud, and despite if the tall man wants to slap his dumb face, he decides against it for obvious reasons – don’t ruin the make-up - and keeps doing his work.

As a former model, Hyungwon has in his bag a little bit of his old make-up and seeing that this seems to be something really important for his elder friend he decides a little bit of sacrificing needs to be done – “I’m gonna add some color in your lips and cheeks, nothing too obvious though. Ah, and a little shadow around your eyes would be perfect. And don’t look at me like that, you’re the epitome of the obvious.”

“It’s not what you think…”

“Does that matter though? What I think I mean, I have absolutely nothing against Changkyun and if spending time with him is what makes you happy, then I have nothing to say about it.”

“Really?”

“Yes really. Or did you think Minhyukkie and I would get jealous or something…”

“Remember Yoongi…”

“Oh yeah, we were really jealous back then, I give you that. But we also thought you had a crush on him during high school so we were more overprotective than jealous.”

“Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, _what did you say?”_

“Nothing, now close your eyes and don’t move.”

Hyungwon decides to apply only a little bit of beige and pale pink shades and eyeliner to define his eyes. Kihyun’s pretty, he doesn’t need a lot of make up to stand out. His lips, however, it’s another story; They’re really beautiful if he can say, and in his face that’s what attracts the most attention alongside with his little dot above, so a little trace of red would do magic to him.

“I didn’t have a crush on him, I just liked him like a friend.”

Hyungwon rolls his eyes, hard, because even after all those years Kihyun still doesn’t admit it - “Don’t tell Minhyuk I told you this, but you know? When we were back in high school we were almost sure you and that Yoongi guy were secretly in love and dating, like, you can’t blame us Kihyun, you _ditched_ us for him most times I could count and you never did that before _for anyone_ , including your girlfriends, and that guy looked at you as if you were the most precious thing in the world. But we thought your insecurities and prejudice came between you two and you let the opportunity go…”

“So creative, you two really should write a book together or something.”

“Don’t go all sarcastic on me right now, especially when I’m telling you something really important.”

“Why do I feel like I’m going to regret hearing this so much, uh? You’re already sounding like Hyunwoo.”

“To not torture you too much with this… I hated the guy, he took you away from me… from us… you know I don’t like sharing Kihyun and Minhyuk’s worse than me, but I loved he was making you happy, then someday you two just fell apart and I saw how that hurt you deeply and that hurt me too, I don’t want that to happen again.”

“I--- don’t know how I should feel about those words, like, are you possessive over me? Me?”

“So, are you actually ignoring the whole point of this conversation?”

“Well, you can’t blame me, that shocked me…”

“I like Changkyun for you.”

“Whaat?? I told you it’s not like---”

“We’re done, look yourself in the mirror, thank me later, preferably with a nice home-made meal.”

Kihyun obeys, taking the little hand-mirror and gasping in surprise when he looks himself. He knew he was a mess before, a BIG mess, but now he actually looks a normal person going to his first date --- a friends date, as he keeps reminding himself --- Hyungwon did wonderful things to his face, especially how pretty he looks right now.

He never relied on make-up before, letting his ‘masculinity’ do the whole work, but now? Now make-up is his best friend. It’s not like he’s insecure of his face or something but for some reason he can’t explain, he wants to impress Changkyun. Ugh, that really sounds bad, thank goodness he didn’t say it out loud.

“Be happy, Kihyun, no matter next to who you are.”

Kihyun turns around to reply to that, but Hyungwon leaves the dressing room fast without looking once behind, without waiting for Kihyun’s answer, so after hearing his over-happy best friend calling for him, the short brunet decides to follow Hyungwon as well.

As soon as he steps into the room, feels like the whole café stopped what they were doing to look at him, even though he knows that’s impossible, but he feels self-conscious of himself and the only person he’s capable to stare it’s Changkyun.

The younger boy meets his nervous eyes in the second Kihyun enters, blinking confused as if he didn’t recognized him at first, and then, not too discretely may he add, his gaze traces from the top of his head until his shoes, detailing every single aspect of his dressing and at the end, his eyes lies in the elder’s lips and blushing turning around immediately. _Changkyun fucking blushed!_

Shyly, he gets up from his designate chair behind the counter and walks to stand in front of Kihyun, still acting like the first time they met, trying his best to avoid the elder’s eyes, but then again, Kihyun also finds it hard not to look at any other thing in the room that is not Changkyun. That white shirt and those ripped light-blue jeans fit perfectly on him.

“You look good today, Hyung.”

“You too Changkyunnie, but I’m disappointed, no hug for Hyung today?”

Changkyun finally, _finally_ , meets his eyes again and a huge smile breaks on his face. He doesn’t waste any other second to wrap his arms tightly around Kihyun’s waist and bringing the elder’s body impossibly closer against him. Changkyun smells so good, like a mix of pineapple and strawberry. So sweet, like him.

“I didn’t want to ruin the outfit but if you insist~”

“Brat.” – Kihyun laughs, folding his arms around the raven haired man’s neck and clinging to him until his irritating friends decide to interrupt the moment.

Which only took them… 10 seconds.

“You two are going to a date and you didn’t tell me?!”

Minhyuk said that out enough to attract the attention of few customers, but if Kihyun’s 100% sincere, he prefers that the whole South Korean, the whole world heard Minhyuk’s words, rather than have Changkyun to be the one hearing them. The younger looks at him with the questions flying between them, and when Kihyun plays the innocent card, the little shit decides to ask…

“Are we going to a date, Hyung?”

“Hyungwon!”

“I swear I said nothing to them!”

Kihyun looks at the youngest between them, his cheeks burning with the implication but when he says the following words, the brown haired man wants nothing else but run away and hide.

“Like, if you wanted to go on a date with me you just needed to say it.”

“In your dreams, little brat.”

Before any of his friends - or himself - could embarrass him more, Kihyun takes the younger man’s hand and drags him out of the Coffee shop, taking a long breath to try to ignore Minhyuk saying ‘The _boss is gone, let’s throw a party’_ or Hyungwon _‘Use protection’_ or Hyunwoo _‘Guys we’re not alone, remember?’_ at this point he can only trust Mr. Choi and the man rarely leaves the kitchen.

“So, where are we going Hyung? The fancy clothes, the mysteriousness, the _perfume_ …”

“First, the clothes aren’t fancy even though they look cool on you, second, I told you, we are running some errands, and third, _perfume_?”

“Yes, you smell like lilies.”

“Oh, that’s Hyungwon’s fault.”

“It’s nice.”

“Thank you.”

It was still a little bit before seven before they exited the Coffee shop, so Kihyun takes the opportunity to walk slowly and enjoy the younger’s company. Changkyun seems to be in good mood today as he smiles more freely and holds Kihyun’s hand while they walk ‘because he doesn’t want to get lost’ he said.

“So, how was your day, Hyung?”

“A mess. First of all today was the worst day of my hair, remember? So after you left I spent like an hour fighting with it until it seemed more or less acceptable. Then any of my clothes just looked right on me, I hated them all! Also I was late for the first class but thankfully Mr. Byun cares two shits about it and let it pass, but in my second period a fucking teacher I hate so much scolded me _twice_ and guess why? Because Lee- _super loud and mega annoying-_ Minhyuk, then this obsessive girl came into the shop and wanted me to _date_ her, can you believe it?”

“I liked your hair in the morning, it was curly and so cute.”

“Stop it, it was a mess.”

“And about what you asked, yes I can believe it, like who wouldn’t want to date you?”

“But by force?”

“Well, you said it yourself, we don’t know what kind of lunatic is on the streets, hope you didn’t bed her or she’ll be waaaay worse.”

“Ufff please Changkyun I have standards, ridiculously high standards, I wouldn’t let her anywhere near my bed.”

“I’ve slept in your bed, though. Do I reach those ‘ridiculous high standards’ of yours?”

“Exceeded them, actually.”

“What?”

“ _What_?”

“So, we will keep playing this game where one of us pretends to not ‘hear’ what the other said and the other just drop it?”

“What?”

“Hyung!”

Kihyun laughs out loud seeing the little pout in the younger’s lips, trying to brush away the thought of how adorable he actually looks right now. It’s when the younger tries to complain a little bit more that Kihyun realizes they’ve already reached their destination and tugging the younger’s hand, they stop at the entrance of the restaurant.

“You know if ‘running errands’ means to you going to fancy restaurants, then please hire me because I want the job.”

“Do you? Because you know I could give you a job in the coffee shop.”

“Nah, with you there? I wouldn’t concentrate.”

“What?”

_“What?”_

“Changkyun-ah!”

“Revenge is so underappreciated. It feels wonderful.”

This time it's Kihyun who ends pouting, but he already knows this little game of them and he won’t get any other word out of Changkyun’s mouth. So, brushing the uneasiness away, Kihyun opens the door and lets him enter first as the gentleman he is. Changkyun huffs at Kihyun’s cocky smirk while leading him to one of the tables but laughs nevertheless, following Kihyun’s lead gladly.

“This place is so nice.”

“Yeah, it really is.”

“Why did you bring me here? And please don’t tell me again we’re running errands because I’ll get up and leave you here.”

“Actually I’m working. Mostly I’m doing my mom’s job right now.”

“ _What_?”

“My mom owns this restaurant but she doesn’t have time to supervise this place or any other under her name, so she sends me once every month to see how things are going. But here all the workers are my friends so I needed an unbiased opinion.”

“So, that’s why you brought me here.” – Again, Changkyun starts pouting, crossing his arms above his chest to emphasize his annoyance - “And here I was thinking you wanted to spend more time with me.”

“Well, both cases could be applied here. I love spending time with you.”

Changkyun’s little frown changes into something softer, his eyes showing a fondness no one ever has seen in him before and a little smile tugging at his lips until he’s fully smiling, so wide that his dimples are showing. Changkyun moves his hand through the table to grab Kihyun’s and squeeze it lovingly. Kihyun doesn’t know how to explain to his heart that it shouldn’t be beating in the way it is beating, as if it wants to rip his chest in two.

 “Me too Hyung. I really love spending time with you too.”

Kihyun doesn’t know what should he say or do, his senses are hyper aware of the part where their bodies are touching and how his little smile is doing things to his heart he thought were impossible.

Thankfully, Kihyun’s saved when the waiter decides to approach their table exactly in that moment.

“Welcome! What can I get you sirs? Oh Kihyun! It’s you.”

“Hello Yoongi. Long time no see.”

“Yeah, because _someone_ doesn’t call anymore. Who is this? A new friend?”

“Yoongi, this is Changkyun, Changkyun, this is Yoongi, he’s a song-writer you know? Maybe someday you can hang up and share some lyrics or whatever you poetic weirdos do.”

“Oh my god, really?” – Changkyun’s eyes spark with emotion, stretching his arm for him to shake it. Yoongi looks a little taken aback for his sudden enthusiasm but he takes Changkyun’s hand with a little shy smile.

“Technically I’m still studying but sure kiddo, show me someday what you got.”

“Soooo, Min Yoongi, you took exactly 5 minutes to attend a new customer, too long too long.”

“Ah Hyung you can’t be serious! The restaurant is packed, it can’t be helped!” – For everyone’s surprise, Changkyun’s the one complaining for Kihyun’s ‘injustice’ and siding with Yoongi instead of him. He’s looks so cute though, so Kihyun really can’t complain anymore about the service.

Yoongi notices the obvious change of behavior from the brown haired man, and smirking he says – “Oh my god I love this kid Ki, bring him more often.”

Kihyun, however, prefers to ignore his old friend’s words and takes the menu even if he knows what is written there by memory already - “Do you want something, Changkyun?”

“Ehhh, no?”

“Let me rephrase that, what do you want to eat Changkyun?”

The younger man mirrors his actions with a little pout, eyeing the menu with the exact same face he had the first time he ordered coffee in his shop, as if he’s mentally counting how much money he has in his pockets and how it’ll affect his economy for the month, Kihyun hates it.

“What about pizza?”

“Are you sure? What about Meat? Or chicken? Or Salad?”

“Pizza!”

“You’re a real kid.”

This is the first time one of his dates --- friends date--- orders pizza in a fancy restaurant but Kihyun finds himself incapable to say no. He gives the menus to Yoongi while adding a few extra ingredients to the pizza and two sodas, while the _kid_ plays with the neatly folded napkins.

“Next time, I’m ordering for you.”

“Awww, are you already planning our second date?”

“We’re running errands Changkyun, _working_.”

“Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure.”

So frustrating.

Kihyun watches how the younger man rest his arms in the table, hiding his face there while humming the tone of the songs in the background, then little by little as the song is getting to the end, the words are a little bit more audible.

 

_"I know I stand in line_

_Until you think you have the time_

_To spend an evening with me_

_And if we go someplace to dance_

_I know that there's a chance_

_You won't be leaving with me_

_Then afterwards, we drop into a quiet place_

_And have a drink or two._

_And then I go and spoil it all_

_By saying something stupid like_

**_I love you_ ** _._

 

Kihyun’s attention snaps when the younger sang the last three verses of the song, but brushing again the feeling, he decides to pat the younger’s head so he’d look at him.

“Gonna see how things are working in the kitchen Kyun, sorry for leaving you alone, I’ll be fast.”

“Come back before the food arrives or I’ll start eating without you.”

“Brat, wait for me.”

Changkyun laughs, pushing him to do whatever he needs to do fast, so he’ll come fast and he can keep bothering him.

Thankfully there’s nothing wrong with this restaurant. The employees are working well, the manager is his friend so he has nothing to say against him, everything looks clean and tidy, doesn’t seem like something is missing and well, he has no complaint.

Took him at least fifteen minutes to do everything, rushing because he doesn’t want to leave Changkyun alone for so long, and despite having a good relationship with most employees there, he tries his best to not talk a lot with them, especially with Seokjin or Jimin, apologizing because they wanted to kill him when he passed next to them and didn’t stop to talk.

However, he runs away from the kitchen as fast as he can and stands in the door incapable to take his eyes off of Changkyun. Kihyun knew the younger loves sitting beside the windows, that’s why he chose that seat, but seeing him glancing at the outdoors with a serene face makes something twitch in his stomach.

The younger looks so lonely.

Kihyun tries to make the less sound while approaching their assigned table, and thankfully Changkyun’s so into his own world to notice the playful little shit right behind him, and instead of doing what he wanted to do so much, Kihyun stands behind him listening what the black haired was singing perfectly in English, again.

 

_‘I’m the first to admit that I was reckless_

_I get lost in your beauty_

_And I can’t see two feet in front of me_

_And I know in my heart_

_You’re just a moving part_

 

_And yes_

_I’ll let you use me from the day that we first met,_

_But I’m not done yet,_

_Falling for you_

_Fool’s gold,_

_I knew that you turned it on for every one you’ve meet_

_But I don’t regret_

_Falling for you_

_Fool’s gold’_

 

_I know your love is not real_

_That’s not the way you feel… ’_

 

“Kyunnie~”

Kihyun laughs when the younger boy yelps in surprise, turning immediately around to glare at the little shit - “Gosh Hyung, are you trying to kill me?!”

“Nah, then the date would’ve gone horribly wrong if you’d ended dead.”

“Ha. Ha _So funny_ …” – Changkyun mutters a few intelligible words under his breath, but Kihyun suspects is something similar to _‘After leaving me for my own for a whole hour’_ obviously exaggerating some facts but the elder let him be, taking his seat in front of the younger man and even laughing for how childishly cute and upset Changkyun is.

“Can’t help it, you looked like your body was here but your mind was floating somewhere near Jupiter or something, what’s wrong?”

“Of course, my date abandoned me here alone, _that_ happened.”

“Sorry, I really needed to go Kyunnie, you know I wouldn’t have let you alone if it wasn’t really urgent.”

“It’s okay, Hyung, at least you’re already back.”

They entertain themselves talking about whatever came into their minds until the food arrived and Kihyun can see with his own eyes how much the younger actually meant it when he said he _wanted_ to eat pizza _‘It’s definitively my favorite food in all over the world’_ he said while taking a slice into his hands. Kihyun laughs seeing the younger debating with himself how should he take it, then fighting with the cheese because _‘It’s too cheesy, I bite and bite and bite and it’s like I’ll never finish to eat it!’_ and at the end _‘God, this is the best pizza I’ve had in my entire life!’_

Kihyun’s very tempted to leave the food on the plate untouched and just stare at Changkyun, but he knows how much the younger man detests being in the end of his longing stares, and before he complains, Kihyun takes a slice as well.

The ‘friends date’ was actually a nice idea, he got to spend a wonderful time with Changkyun and said man seems to be happier now that his tummy is full. He ate like no tomorrow and for some reason, that’s really something Kihyun loves to see.

It’s around ten when they’re heading back to Kihyun’s apartment. Kihyun offered the younger to stay the night but Changkyun rejected kindly the suggestion, telling him he misses his bed and wants to sleep there a whole night ‘But don’t take in the wrong way Hyung, I really, really love sleeping with you.’

As they’re walking, their hands brush against each other as if a stronger force is pulling them together despite the huge space they have around, and regardless of the embarrassment in his body the following action brought to Kihyun, the brunet takes Changkyun’s hand in his and intertwines their fingers together, exactly in the same way the younger did before, walking ahead without looking at his direction once.

The younger didn’t ask for his hand back and Kihyun didn’t let him go either, so talking about whatever things are in their minds, they walk until Kihyun’s complex, the long way.

“Are you _completely_ sure you don’t want to go upstairs?”

“I’d love to Hyung, and you know I do, but it’s better if I sleep in my room tonight. Except that I’m a man who can be easily convinced so better you-…”

“ _Please_?”

“Hyung! Don’t do this to me please, I have to go!”

“ _Please_?”

“Kihyun-hyung!”

Kihyun chuckles, finally releasing the younger’s hand from his hold and wrapping his waist with his arms to pull him in a crushing goodbye hug. The younger sighs contently in his embrace, his arms going as well around Kihyun’s waist and hiding his face in the elder’s neck – “Thank you for accompanying me tonight, I really appreciated it Kyunnie.”

“Whenever you want Hyung, but promise you’ll let me pay for the food at least!”

“Why should I promise something like that? I didn’t pay for anything tonight.”

“Still! I don’t want you to think I’m taking advantage of you in any possible way, especially financially.”

Inside his mind Kihyun prays Changkyun would someday actually take advantage of him and he wouldn’t even mind, in that way at least Kihyun would be completely sure Changkyun’s fine, eating and sleeping well, possibly at his side, possibly in his bed, and the elder would only ask for cuddles and kisses as repay.

Kisses in the cheeks, he finds himself correcting his mind, as crazy as it could sound.

“Well, next time we’ll see okay? We can pay half and half.”

As if Kihyun would let him actually pay for something, pff.

“Okay… that’s better.”

Changkyun’s the first one to break the embrace but still his hands don’t move from their position holding Kihyun’s waist, still not ready to let him go and clinging onto this last moment together for the night. Kihyun doesn’t make any movement to walk away from Changkyun either and stares at the raven haired man’s eyes incapable to look away and with a simple toothless smile he mutters another _‘Are you completely sure you don’t want to go upstairs with me?’._

Changkyun finally realizes how close they actually are, and biting his lower lip, his gaze drops to Kihyun’s mouth still saying those suggestive words, and Changkyun’s dying to lean in, kiss those pink lips senseless and accept the offer…

But exactly in that moment, Kihyun realizes, what’s he saying, _what he is doing,_ and pushing slightly the younger away from his body, he takes two steps backwards with a semi panic setting in his stomach and hands shaking for the nervousness.

“Well… hmm… it’s obvious you _need_ to go somewhere else, so… see you tomorrow?” – Kihyun stutters several times through that statement and even though it’s embarrassing how evident his lisp is right now, he finds himself not caring at all about anything of it, and actually takes another three steps away from the younger’s body ‘subtly’ as he wishes it actually was.

“Y-yeah, sure, see you Hyung!” – And Changkyun’s the first one to run away leaving Kihyun behind with a heart beating as fast as lightning and a brain working in miles per hour.  

 _‘What the hell I was thinking?’_ Kihyun wonders almost slapping his head against the cold metal of the elevator.

 _‘I was definitively not thinking at all._ ’ He replies to himself.

**~*~**

 

If there’s something Kihyun loves and appreciates in a person, a friend, a lover, it’s honesty.

He really doesn’t find any purpose to lie to someone where at the end of the day the truth will be known, because between earth and sky there’s no place to hide, when keeping a lie for so long is way harder that just say the truth right away. Sometimes the truth hurts but it hurts _way_ more to discover a person you love is lying to you.

That’s one of the reasons why he kept Hyungwon and Minhyuk by his side for so long. They’re annoying, sure, and sometimes the teasing goes too far until the point they would end up fighting and not talking _for_ _days_ sometimes even _weeks_ , but if there’s something he can’t deny, it’s that they’re honest, sometimes _too_ honest for his liking.

Kihyun knows if he sometimes does something wrong, he’ll have one of his friends to point it at him without hesitance or sugaring and he doesn’t want it any other way. He knows if sometimes he needs someone to tell him his failures, they’ll do it, he knows if he’d need someone to lean on and cry, it would be them, then they’ll tease him until his death, but that’s okay.

Kihyun _trusts_ them, he _loves_ them.

He remembers the first time he saw the overly happy kid called Lee Minhyuk, approaching him with a wide smile because ‘your chubby cheeks attracted me, you’re adorable, want to be my friend?’ and Kihyun was new in the city so he said yes.

Not long later he realized Minhyuk and Hyungwon came in a pack together, whenever the elder moved, Hyungwon would follow and the other way around and that was okay because they welcomed them in their little circle.

He remembers elementary school and how hard those years were. Kids sometimes can be really cruel, but that’s normal because they don’t know or don’t care the effect their words have on other people, in other kids, they just say hurtful stuff because it is funny and don’t think how painful it could be. Kihyun suffered a lot for his weight and sometimes he didn’t want to eat to be ‘fit’ as the rest.

Kihyun hated to be chubby when he was younger, but he always had Minhyuk and Hyungwon by his side, they defended him, fought for him and made him understand there was nothing wrong with him, that he was _adorable_.

During middle school he lost too much weight, he was so thin back then but the hurtful comments didn’t stop for it, but now it was because he was _‘too feminine’_. There’s nothing he could do about his face, he liked his face, as well as he liked to sing and play the piano but other guys thought he wasn’t man enough, but he knew the comments started because he attracted girls’ attention with his delicate features.

He was handsome, with cute cheeks, with strong mind and nice personality, and he learnt how to use it during high school, and after dating with every pretty girl in the school, his popularity improved. Weird right? His ‘masculinity’ never was questioned after the list of girls he bedded became longer.  

He became cocky during those years, thinking the place he touched was something similar to holy, especially after his dad’s company got bigger and money was filling their bank accounts nicely, and during that time was when he needed his best friends the most. Always remembering him the place where he came from and who really meant something to him.

University came and he started working, and his life was better now and Minhyuk and Hyungwon were still by his side.

From all the people that came into Kihyun’s life, Hyungwon and Minhyuk were the ones he treasures the most.

But as he stares in horror at his two ‘best friends’ kissing in the changing room, he discovered how wrong he was. How could he trust… how can he _love_ someone who has been lying to him the whole time? They knew everything about Kihyun, _everything_ and he knew so little about them.

How could he trust people whom don’t trust him?

How could he trust people who lied?

How could they hide so much from him?

For how long?

Maybe sometimes live in a lie is better because when reality hits you, it hurts so fucking much.

He shouldn’t be there, they knew it. He was supervising one of his mom’s department stores when he received a call from his father asking him to go home as fast as he can, that it was urgent and remembering he left his car’s key in the changing room he came back to the coffee shop, and found… _this_.

Maybe he should’ve gone walking. It would be better.

“ _Guys_?”

Hyungwon pushes Minhyuk out of him as soon as the voice of his brown haired best friend resounds in the room. They look at him with eyes as saucers and panic set in their faces, but don’t dare to say anything, waiting for Kihyun’s anger outburst but that doesn’t come. Instead of Kihyun’s tantrum, the shorter man turns around and starts walking away without sparing them a glace nor a word and his disapproving silence is worse than any hurtful word, that’s when Minhyuk reacts, holding his arm to stop him.

“Kihyun-ah, wait one minute and listen to us, please.”

Hyungwon stands behind his… boyfriend… staring at Kihyun with regret and fear but doesn’t make any movement towards him, doesn’t try to stop him, doesn’t try to explain, he just… stares and that irritates Kihyun even further when he glances at his ‘best friends’ again.

“ _What_ , Minhyuk? What are you going to explain? How long you’ve been lying to me? _Friends_? _You’re friends or something more_?” – Every word Kihyun pronounces is accompanied with venom, showing how their actions hurt him. Kihyun, if he’s sincere, doesn’t mind they’re dating, what bothers him it’s that they trust him so little to let him know. And even now they look like if they prefer to be murdered in the worst kind of way than telling Kihyun they’re something more.

“We are… We are dating and I’m not sorry for it, I love Hyungwon and you have nothing to do with my affairs. Today is our second anniversary and…”

“For two fucking years? You’ve been together for two years, and never decided to tell me? When I’ve told you everything, Minhyuk, _everything_ , my happiness, my sadness, even the stupidest single thing about my life I shared it with you. So what now, there’s a wall between you and me I can’t cross? You two are here and I’m at the other side of the world? What else did you hide from me? I trusted both of you blindly but at the end I don’t even know who you are!”

“It’s not like that, just because we didn’t tell you something about us doesn’t mean everything we said was a lie.”

“Surprise! That’s what lies do, they break the trust and getting it back is a shit of difficult. That’s why I hate them, that’s why I don’t tell them, and I hoped the persons around were with me as sincere as I’m with them, and _bam!_ ” – Kihyun clasps his hands together, producing a loud sound in the mostly silent room, scaring Minhyuk while Hyungwon moves a little behind him – “The persons I loved as much as I love my family _lied._ ”

“Hyung.” – Hyungwon takes a step closer to Kihyun with caution, his hand trying to catch the shorter man but too scared of Kihyun would attack him. By instinct, Kihyun moves farther away of the two men, with a deep frown in his face - “It’s not like we wanted to hide this from you, I --- _we_ wanted to tell you, since a long time actually, but… but you… you had have _this_ issue with gays… I know the way you try to hide your discontent with Jinwoo and Myungjun’s relationship, but your face say it everything… and you didn’t… you still can’t accept you were… you are…”

“I am _what_? I am… _gay_? _Oh_ , now I understand _everything_. Why I was so confused before, of course I would be if you tell me over and over again I like guys and go find a good… dick? That’s what you said, Minhyuk?”

Minhyuk doesn’t reply, too astonished for the short man words. Hyungwon looks surprised to see his friends this mad, he _hates_ to see him this mad. Kihyun’s hardly the most patient person but he has never been so angry at them to the point of seeing red.  

“That’s why you keep pushing me to date Changkyun? Because you wanted me to be like you?”

“We aren’t pushing you, you like Changkyun and we wanted you to be happy.”

“So, you want me to be happy? How? _Lying_ to me?”

“Ki…”

“I’m not like you,”

“You _are_.”

“I’d rather die before being like you!”

The words feels sour on his tongue after he pronounces it, it hurt him and for the look in his friends’ faces it’s obvious it hurt them too, but Kihyun doesn’t take it back, turning around and slamming the door shut behind him without giving them the chance to stop him again.

And today was a good day before this.

 

 

 

After 24 years of life, Kihyun discovered life could be very shitty when it really wants to be. Kihyun also discovered everything you know could change in a millisecond, a minute you could be happy--- _‘the happiest person alive’_ and the next one you’re crying in your favorite bar with no one to give you company. That one minute you could have everything you ever wanted, the life you ever wanted, hold the world in your hands, touch the sky with your index finger, and the next seeing your life falling apart before your eyes, only leaving the suffocating pain behind and there’s nothing you can do to stop it.

_“Sorry for calling you here I know you two are very busy, but we have something to tell you, some bad news about your dad and I want to discuss them with you.”_

Kihyun shouts at the bartender for another glass and the boy – Jeon Jungkook, one of his younger friends – looks at him with worry but still fills his glass again, not before reminding Kihyun that he should slow down a little bit. Kihyun doesn’t pay attention to what Jungkook was saying and again sipped a little of the content of the glass. He doesn’t even know what he’s drinking, it tastes awful, the bitterness mixed with something extremely sweet makes him feel nauseous, but it feels so good, his muscles relaxing and his mind forgetting all his problems as he drinks the new glass in one go, immediately ordering one more.

_“We’ve been thinking about this for a while now and we want you to know this won’t affect you in any way.”_

Bad news could be _‘your dog died’_ or _‘your uncle is sick’_ but this is not just a ‘bad news’, this is a catastrophe, and it _does_ affect him a lot thank you very much. It hurts, it really hurts, and his parents don’t know how much. Maybe some people doesn’t know it but their decisions and their actions could hurt the ones closer to them until the point of leaving a huge hole in the chests of those who loves them, impossible to fill even if they try.

_“A divorce mom? Why? You want that? You really want that?”_

The woman looked to the other side to avoid her elder son’s accusing glare, but it was evident for the obvious pain in her actions this thing was destroying her as much as it was destroying her sons, but she still doesn’t say anything. He didn't blame their dad, but Hungki did, and maybe Kihyun really deep inside of his soul did it too.

_“It’s your fault, right dad? Why? After almost thirty years together you decided to just throw everything to the garbage. Is it another woman? Is it that? You’re exchanging our family for a cheap slut?”_

_“It’s not another woman, Hungki. Don’t blame your dad, we’ve been thinking about a divorce for a long time, we decided this together.”_

But the man wasn’t looking anywhere near his sons, his characteristic confidence and strong personality sometimes he and Hungki feared were nowhere to be found in this man. He looked unsure, guilty, and that intensified his brother’s fury.

_“Together mom? Then why do you look like this?”_

_“You won’t understand Hungki.”_

Kihyun’s angry now, but back then he was red with fury. Still he didn’t react, just looked frozen at the scene with rounded eyes, Hungki and his dad fighting and his mom crying trying to stop them. This kind of violence is nothing Kihyun was used to.

Hungki didn’t bid goodbye to any of them before storming out of the house, without looking at his parents, without looking at him. His mom stared at Kihyun, expecting another outburst from her younger son but Kihyun didn’t do it, he didn’t have the strength to do it, so he just walked out directly to his car and started driving, astonished.

Right in that moment, Kihyun needed someone he could lean on, he needed a shoulder to cry on, but he didn’t want to be near Hyungwon or Minhyuk at least for the rest of the day. Yoongi was busy as usual, Namjoon was in the U.S. in a internship and he has no idea how to contact Changkyun, so other than them, he has no one. So he drove to his favorite bar and hadn’t left for almost four hours.

It hurts even worse because that day Kihyun didn’t lose only his family but also two of the people he trusted the most.

“Hyung, you need to stop.” – Jungkook takes away the glass from Kihyun’s hand before the elder has any protests to voice, and despite said man wanting it back, he’s so gone in the liquor to stand up by himself and fight with an obviously stronger man.

“Jungkook-ah! Give it back to me! I’m paying so you shouldn’t be stopping me.”

“Look, I’m your friend first rather than one of the employees here, and I know when you had enough. I prefer to lose a bit of money than lose you, Hyung.”

“But I’m perfectly fine Kook, I’m not even tipsy…”

“You’re drunk.”

Jungkook spins around trying his best to ignore Kihyun’s loud cries and childish complains, telling something to the other bartender and walking back to his side, now at the other side of the counter to put Kihyun in a standing position.

“But I don’t want to go!”

“C’mon Hyung, they only gave me an hour and your apartment is quite far from here.”

“Buuut I dooon’t waaant to g-gooo J-Jungkookieee…”

Jungkook rolls his eyes, but doesn’t let the elder go, wrapping his strong arm around his waist and forcing him to walk out of the bar. They attract a lot of attention, especially outside the bar but the younger ignores it, as well as the shouts coming from Kihyun’s mouth and the little hits Kihyun throws in whatever part of his body he can reach. They don’t hurt anyway.

Jungkook is young and has great stamina, but he feels as if he aged at least twenty years after half an hour of fighting with Kihyun’s drunken ass. He thought about taking his car and driving but fearing the elder would puke there, he preferred not to, but now he regrets it.

Jungkook feels triumphant when Kihyun’s building is almost around the corner but before he can reach for it, a young petite boy gets up from the entrance and runs in their direction. Thinking the worst, Jungkook prepares himself for any confrontation with a possible robber but the guy, instead of murderous, looks truly worried staring at the man still in his arms. 

“Kihyun-hyung!”

 _Oh_.

Jungkook looks flabbergasted how the man in his arms recovers a little bit of consciousness and strength, enough to push him away to take a few steps alone before collapsing into the stranger boy’s arms.

“Oh my god, Hyung what happened to you?”

“Kyunnieee…”

Jungkook stares with a raised eyebrow at the duo. Kihyun wraps his arms around this guy’s neck, pulling him as close as his drunkenness allows him while the other instantly has his arms around his waist, trying to keep them both on their two feet and not falling onto the floor.

“Are you his friend?”

“Yeah, I’m Changkyun, sorry for the inconvenience and thank you for bringing him home.” – Changkyun says with a shy smile and as much as he can, the boy bows politely at him, before cooing at Kihyun’s shameless protests.

_Oh, **that** Changkyun. _

“You sound a lot like his boyfriend.”

“On, no, it’s not like _that_.”

“I’m Yoongi’s friend and I’ve heard quite interesting stuff about you…”

“No, no, no, no Yoongi-hyung got it all wrong too…”

“I need to go, take care of him, I guess? Good luck by the way.”

Changkyun stares the guy leaving him alone with a very drunk Kihyun clinging onto him, and the young black haired man can’t believe ‘Kihyun’s handsome friend’ trusted someone he hardly knows, but oh well, he’s not complaining, having his crush between his arms like this feels like a miracle.

Changkyun sighs tiredly seeing the elder man almost sleeping on him now, and despite the long shifts he spent working that day, he just can’t leave Kihyun like that. Not after all the stuff Kihyun has tried to help him with those past few months.

So, using the little strength his body still has, the younger man drags Kihyun into the building, doing his best to not let him fall when they’re in front of his apartment’s door and he needs to take the keys out of his back pockets.

Kihyun doesn’t seem to mind and Changkyun pats himself on the back when he enters the apartment and sits the brown haired man in the big sofa. Almost immediately Gigi gets up from her little bed when she hears the sounds of struggling coming from the living room and climbs into her owner’s lap, getting comfortable there. Despite the movement, Kihyun doesn’t wake up so Changkyun thinks it’s safe walk to the kitchen now.

“Please, don’t go.”

Changkyun’s taken by surprise when Kihyun’s delicate fingers circle his wrist in a rather strong grip, enough to stop him from leaving. The younger man blinks in confusion at the little pout on the elder man’s face but smiles nevertheless, making impossible for his face to hide the fondness. So instead of being annoyed by the drunk man, he sits next to Kihyun, really close but the elder doesn’t seem to mind, his hand raising to the other’s head and pushing the hair out of his eyes and softly dropping to caress his hamster-like cheek.

“I won’t go anywhere. I’m bringing you a glass of water, Hyung.”

“I don’t need it.”

“Yes, you do.”

“I don’t want it.”

“But you’ll drink it.”

“I don’t want you to go.”

“I’m not going anywhere meanwhile you want me here.”

“Always.”

Changkyun can’t stop that warm bubbling in his stomach when Kihyun says that word, trying to blame it all to the alcohol, but still he takes the hand wrapped tightly around his wrist and pulls it closer to his face almost without any resistance, and staring right into Kihyun’s eyes he kisses the back of it.

Kihyun turns around, embarrassed, but he can’t help the smile creeping up on his face from Changkyun’s actions, though the blush on his cheeks doesn’t go unnoticed by the younger. The younger boy tries again to get up and this time the brunet doesn’t try to stop him, so he takes the chance to go to the kitchen, really, really fast.

Kihyun glances worriedly at Changkyun when he left his side and starts walking away but relaxes in the comfort of his sofa when he saw him go to the kitchen, just like he promised.

_‘Changkyun’s here, he won’t leave me, he’s here, he won’t leave me, he’s here, he won’t leave me, he’s here, he won’t leave me, he’s here, he won’t leave me, he’s here, he won’t leave me, he’s here…’_

Kihyun may be a little bit more drunk than he admits himself to be, but he’s totally aware of his surroundings. He knows where he is, who is with him, and he knows something settled in his stomach seeing Changkyun like this, in his own home, prancing around as if this is his own place, like he belongs here, like Changkyun belongs by his side and that simple thought makes his heart beat contently in his chest.

Changkyun’s an attractive man no matter how many times he has said it already in the past. Every time he meets the younger boy it’s like he gets more and more beautiful each time. But it’s not only his physical appearance what Kihyun’s attracted to. Changkyun has a beautiful personality, is a cheerful man, and Kihyun can feel like himself in front of him. He’s a good friend and Kihyun bets he would be a great lover too.

And Changkyun’s wearing his clothes again, those jeans and that black t-shirt he lend him last week, and he looks so stunning right now, sparking a kind of weird warmth in Kihyun’s belly.

Maybe it’s the drunkenness talking but Changkyun looks so…  _delicious_ right now, with those tight jeans hugging his legs so beautifully. Kihyun may admit if Changkyun was an ice cream he would devour him completely. Damn, he would devour him wholly now if Changkyun gives him consent... why does he feels so horny now?

“Hyung, do you wanna shower? I’ve never gotten drunk before so I have no idea how to take care of you, I’ll try my best though...” – Kihyun doesn’t know when or where he got the strength to lay his puppy on the floor and follow Changkyun into the kitchen, all he knows the petite body is right in front of him and he smells so, _so_ good, like vanilla and pineapple and _pastries_ , and Kihyun really can’t stop his body from leaning into the warmth, putting both hands on the sink, unconsciously pinning the boy in between and kissing Changkyun’s nape softly, gently. Changkyun lets out a breathy ‘Hyung?’ as soon as the elder’s lips touch his skin and Kihyun stares with awe how the blush raises to the younger’s ears almost instantly. 

“Have I ever told you how much I love how you smell Changkyun? _So sweet_.”

“Do I smell?” – Kihyun can’t see it, but Changkyun takes his shirt to sniff it, not fully understanding what the elder was talking about - “Oh, I surely rubbed it off from work.”

“Dunno, I only know I want to bite you, can I?”

“ _No_.”

“So _mean_ and to your _Hyung_ too.”

Changkyun chuckles, leaving the glass abandoned in the sink in order to pay full attention to the drunken man behind him. Changkyun takes the opportunity to rest his weight onto the elder’s body, while said man hides his face in the crook of his neck, enveloping him into a tight back-hug. Changkyun doesn’t complain even though he can feel the elder lightly shaking from behind. The black haired man doesn’t know what to say to make him feel better, so instead of words, he decides to use actions, reaching for the hands in his belly and intertwining their fingers together _‘I’m here, Hyung.’_

“You smell awful by the way, how much did you drink?”

“Not sure, probably half of the bar by myself or something.”

“Did something happen?”

“Life, that happened.”

“Yeah, can relate.”

Changkyun doesn’t want to pry further, thinking he doesn’t have any right to ask any questions of someone he has been hiding his past and present from for so long. So, he lets the elder man cling to him, lifting up his head to let Kihyun pepper him with little kisses around his neck, because if that makes him feel better, then there’s not real complain from the younger man.

“Have I ever told you the first time you entered in the coffee shop you stole my breath away?”

Changkyun feels his heart picking up a fast pace at Kihyun’s confession as well as his neck, cheeks, and tip of the ears turning bright red, but brushes off the feeling with the excuse that it’s only the alcohol talking. He just can’t believe it.

“Did I?”

“Yeah, you were so beautiful back then, with those puppy eyes and little pout, you were so shy and I just thought how _adorable_ you were. When I saw you I knew I would gladly spend my whole life staring only at you.”

“Do you? Really?”

“I do. S-Sometimes it’s even difficult get you out of my m-mind, you know? You’re part of my every day Changkyun. When you’re with me, when you talk to me, when you smile at me I just feel like I would die of happiness, and when you’re gone I feel my chest grow heavy, anticipating your next visit. Every time I enter my apartment I want you to be here, when I’m lying in my bed I wish you were there with me, when I enter the coffee shop I pray you would go there that day and every time I hear the bell ringing I hope it’s you.”

“Kihyun…”

_“I like you.”_

Changkyun’s eyes open like two plates, unwrapping himself from grip enough to turn around and meet his eyes. Kihyun’s staring right back at him, not hesitance or doubt in his actions, as he folds his arms around the younger’s hips and pulls him closer to his body.

But despite the words whispered right into his ear, despite knowing Kihyun hates lies, despite the little hope building in his chest, he just _cannot_ believe it - “Hyung, you’re really drunk.”

“So, haven’t you heard drunken men are more sincere?” – Kihyun says with a little teasing smirk that Changkyun seriously isn’t appreciating in this moment, but seconds later, it switches into a little line, trying to show how serious he is about all this… and even like this, Changkyun still can’t trust his words - “Can’t you believe me?”

“I really want to, but sorry, I _can’t_.”

“Why?”

“Because I won’t ever be the person you want, you deserve.”

“You are the person I’ve wanted all my life and you’re more than I’ll ever deserve. You’re special Changkyun, I hope you would see yourself from my eyes and you would understand why I like you so much.”

“Hyung…”

Kihyun doesn’t wait for his answer, as he leans closer to the younger man and kissing tenderly his reddened cheek he says- “Can I kiss you?”

“Hyung I…”

Kihyun kisses the corner of his lips and anticipation grows hugely in the younger man. He’s a player, Changkyun knows that, however Kihyun’s still a gentleman. The elder won’t go any further if Changkyun doesn’t give him the okay first. 

Changkyun wanted to say no, but the willpower his mind would normally have has left his body as soon as the elder starts rubbing little circles into his waist and lower back, kissing now his forehead, dropping to the tip of his nose and later to his cheeks again, _oh so gently_. So instead of pushing him away like he knows he _should_ be doing, Changkyun holds his shoulders, nodding. He _does_ really want to kiss Kihyun right now, he would do _anything_ to feel his lips at least once.

That’s all the elder man needs to lean in and press his lips softly against the younger’s and it feels as if electricity passes through them, settling in their stomachs and branding uncontrollably into every cell of their bodies. It feels like magic though both of them know that doesn’t exist.

The touch was gentle at first, only a lock of lips moving against each other and enjoying the way they mold perfectly. The comforting stroking on his lower back never stopped but now a hand is tenderly cupping his cheek and this feels like a dream.

And Changkyun each time falls, and falls, and falls harder for the elder man.

And Kihyun realizes, and accepts, and admits to himself he has fallen in love without realizing, without warning and that’s perfectly okay.

The elder man takes his time enjoying the gentle touch, savoring the taste of Changkyun’s moist lips, but at some point he tilts his head to one side, licking the black haired man’s lips who immediately opens them to allow entrance to Kihyun’s tongue.

Kihyun’s all too glad to explore the inside of his mouth without any rush, enjoying the way Changkyun’s breath becomes labored, emitting some of the sweetest little sounds from the back of his throat, and moving his hands from his shoulders to his head to tangle his long, gentle-looking fingers with his strands of hair.

Changkyun tastes like something overly sweet, like chocolate and strawberries and something else he can’t decipher; Kihyun wonders incredulously into his mind if he’s made of sugar, or the most delicious things in the world. Curiosity settled into the back of his mind, and instead Kihyun separates their mouths to lick behind his ear and sucks his lobe into his mouth and Changkyun’s grip tightened in his hair, pushing him closer of his skin.

_Oh, Changkyun likes that._

Kihyun, once again, ignores the impatience in the younger’s actions and takes his time exploring more of his weak spots, now nibbling around his neck, licking and marking the skin he can reach with his mouth.  

The brunet lifts one of his hands to cup again Changkyun’s face in his palm, caressing the lightly marked skin with his thump and pushing their foreheads together he whispers huskily – “It’s this okay? Do you want it?”

Changkyun has problems thinking, affected by Kihyun’s kiss and confession but doesn’t need to be a genius to know what Kihyun meant, and he knows he should say no, stop his advances before they do something they’d regret in the morning, but seeing the elder man with lust and care and _love_ filling his eyes, his cheeks adorned by a pretty rosy blush and lips red from their previous make out, Changkyun just can’t say no.

Kihyun smiles tenderly at Changkyun’s nod, sliding his hand from his face, caressing his back, down to his hips and until reaching his bottom, Kihyun grabs the curve of his butt. With a strong grip the elder massages his behind and a loud moan leaves Changkyun’s mouth when Kihyun pulls his hips closer, pressing their cocks together through their clothing.

Kihyun’s lower body is already responding to him and Changkyun needs to admit he is too.

Moving his other hand to cup his other buttcheek, Kihyun turns the boy around away from the sink and half walk- half carries him through the living room until reaching to the door of his bedroom, pushing Changkyun against it.

“I swear to god Changkyun, you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen in my life.”

“T-Thank you.”

Kihyun struggles a bit to open the door, but as soon as he achieves it, he shoves Changkyun into the room and gently makes Changkyun lie on the bed, easing down on top of him, and bending over his lover, Kihyun mutters again his lips – “Definitely the finest, most precious man on earth.”

“Oh god, Hyung please stop, you’re embarrassing me.”

“Don’t be embarrassed to hear the truth.” – Chuckling at Changkyun’s pout, Kihyun leans in to resume their kissing, tongues dueling for dominance but at the end the younger surrenders, enjoying the way Kihyun feverishly kisses him.

After they got into bed, everything turns foggy for the elder man. He remembers undressing Changkyun completely and kissing every single part of his sun-kissed skin. He remembers whispering in his ear over and over again how beautiful and special Changkyun is. He remembers taking the lube from his nightstand and prepping Changkyun and how pliant the younger became for his fingers only. He remembers the ecstacy running through his body when they reached the highest carnal pleasure together. And he remembers Changkyun whispering something but he just can’t remember what.

Oh boy, did he just confess to another man? _Had sex_ with another man? Kihyun’s hella confused but one thing is sure, the next day he will have a lot of explaining to do but right now he’ll enjoy the warmth Changkyun’s naked body provides him and think about the rest when the time comes.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for read it! Did you like it? Let me know~
> 
> Thank you so much to my beta reader: @Tindragon!!
> 
> Want to talk and be mutuals? Find me here:
> 
> [Moonlight2211_](https://twitter.com/Moonlight2211_)


End file.
